Bionic Nostalgia - The Legacy

Fairly quickly after the television debut of "The Six Million Dollar Man" the word 'bionic' entered the lexicon permanently, going from a science fiction term to a science fact in recent years.  While no one has been granted super-strength, speed, or senses from their bionics (that we know of), cybernetic replacement of limbs, as well as things like cochlear implants are almost everyday things. 

As we've seen, the television universe was too big to have just one bionic man.  Soon Steve Austin was joined by the Seven Million Dollar Man, the Bionic Woman, and Maximilian the Bionic Dog.  In 1976, during Lee Majors' bad mustache phase, Vincent Van Patten became the Bionic Boy in a backdoor pilot that failed to go to series.  Both series, "The Six Million Dollar Man" and "The Bionic Woman," left the air in 1978, but would return in just under a decade. 

Three TV movies would follow starting in 1987.  The first, simply and awkwardly called The Return of the Six Million Dollar Man and The Bionic Woman, was similar to the Bionic Boy in two ways - it was a failed pilot and involved a young man getting bionics, in this case, Austin's illegitimate son. The last two, coming in 1989 and 1994, were Bionic Showdown and Bionic Ever After?. 

The legacy of Martin Caidin's Cyborg novel, and the "Six Million Dollar Man" television series that was based on it continues to today. There are novels, comic books, jigsaw puzzles, the "Bionic Six" animated series (among dozens that feature bionics within them), a new, if short-lived, "Bionic Woman" show, and of course the always-threatened-but-never-announced theatrical film. Bionics remains a part of our lives and pop culture decades later.

Check out the rest of my posts in this series here.

Quickies 7-25-2017

Zoolander 2 ~ I hated Zoolander or at least I remember hating Zoolander.  Now I think I might want to give it a serious re-watch.  My mind on the subject has been changed.  Seeing the sequel, Zoolander 2, I understood what was being gone for. Just sit back, relax, and enjoy the stupidity. While before I thought I was looking at a bad "Saturday Night Live" sketch that had gone on far too long, this time, I got the camp, and I saw the superhero parallels, at least in the sequel, and kinda loved it. And if nothing else, the opening gave me new respect for Justin Bieber, and that's saying a lot.

The BFG ~ This film adaptation of a Roald Dahl story is fun, but not as interesting as his other stuff, until they get to the giant meeting the Queen of England, and then it's great. Great fantasy that becomes great funny on a Monty Python scale. The kids will like it more than you will, but they won't get half the jokes. Fun for a rental.

The Wedding Planner ~ One of the terrible things about being in the hospital is that you will watch anything, because sometimes you either can't move or can't find the TV remote to change the channel. When this simple rom-com came on one night, I thought I was in for two hours of hell, but it wasn't half-bad. Predictable from start to finish, but I have to say I quite enjoyed this one… or maybe the IV was just full of good drugs.

Frankenhooker ~ I loved this movie when it first came out, thought it was hilarious, and bought the videotape when it came out. When I worked in a video store, I would push the button on the movie box when I walked by, and it would say, "Wanna date?" and "Got any money?" Hilarious. I saw it recently, the story of a deranged young man who brings his girlfriend back to life using body parts from dead chopped up prostitutes, and I'm sad to say – either I've grown up, or it doesn't hold up at all. I still think the talking box is funny though.

Cars 3

Cars 3 ~ Once you get past the truly dark first teaser trailer that led children, and some adults, to believe Lightning McQueen was dead, this isn't a bad film, and on par with other Disney Pixar flicks, unlike the other Cars sequel and spin-offs like this and this.

Cars 3 does what all good third installments of trilogies do best, it brings the story full circle, and to a lesser extent not only closes the circle but also introduces a new beginning.  As Lightning McQueen finds himself falling behind younger and faster cars with newer and higher technology after a near crippling accident in track, he trains a new contender - just as Doc Hudson, the Fabulous Hudson Hornet, did for him in the first movie.

Speaking of Doc, there is wonderful use of Paul Newman's voice acting from the first movie used in flashback and memory.  It's almost as if Paul was here in this one.  Larry the Cable Guy is back as are all the regulars from the town Radiator Springs, but in greatly reduced roles.  Even Lightning's girlfriend is back, but not as his girlfriend so the story can concentrate on his trainer Cruz. 

This is a good movie, with all the proper Disney Pixar buttons for emotional targeting.  We get new characters aplenty including Armie Hammer's smug rival Jackson Storm, Lightning's smarmy new boss voiced by equally smarmy Nathan Fillion, and a killer school bus from the demolition derby.  Yeah, this one doesn't kill Lightning as the teaser suggested, but it does get dark in places. 

And there're none of those weird human dwellings in this film that made Cars 2 seem so creepy, and made me wonder what happened to the people.  I still maintain that Cars happens in the same universe as Stephen King's "Trucks," just after all the humans are gone. 

All that said, this was a good flick, and better sequel, well worth seeing. 

Ghostbusters II

Ghostbusters II ~ We've talked about how much I love Ghostbusters, and even the recent remake, but back in the day, we all wanted to like the sequel, we really wanted to, and most of us were disappointed. Although, in hindsight, that just might be questionable. In light of friend Derrick Ferguson's positive review of the film and recent TV viewings, I might have changed my mind. Go read it now, and all his other reviews, he rocks. 

I remember distinctly however the moment when I started to doubt the sequel. Run DMC covered the title theme song, and I was a huge fan of theirs and always loved the tune (seriously who didn't, and doesn't?), but the cover was a disappointment, no one's favorite Run DMC song, delivering none of what could have been so cool, just a meh version. This was the first omen.

Then came the movie. I remember even before I saw it, much like recent DC Comics movie releases like Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice and Suicide Squad, the word was bad even before it was released. Despite warnings I was there first night to see it, and first impressions, it was not good. As I recall, it did not last in theaters for very long, nowhere near the blockbuster the first movie was.

There was much reference given to the successful cartoon based on the original movie, so all the characters had to appear, and Slimer was given special preference for screen time against folks who more deserved it. More than lip service was given to the slime that was too integral to this plot, but only funny in the original in one line. Worse than that, it led to the bad special effects of the Statue of Liberty ending that made audiences groan when it was supposed to make them cheer and sing along.

More screen time was given to the 'nerd love' subplot with Rick Moranis and Annie Potts, and of course the biggest drain was Bill Murray (not as enthusiastic, or as funny, this time) and Sigourney Weaver romance/non-romance and baby. Notably the original film was almost flawless, but the only slow parts were with these two I thought. To build on that was a mistake.

All that said, the rest of the film is not bad, and actually a good follow-up to the original. We get a viable and evil-looking villain (Vigo's visage alone, especially in a picture that may or not move is the stuff of nightmares), and a patsy comparable to Weaver and Moranis played by the underappreciated Peter MacNicol who still makes me laugh with that accent (definitely in agreement with Derrick on this). I especially loved the connection to the first film and homage to Son of Kong as the Ghostbusters are put out of business by property damage lawsuits.

As I said, upon re-watching and reading the above-mentioned review, I may have changed my mind. Derrick might be right.  I think it's bad, but not that bad. Unfortunately the experience may have soured much of the cast on doing a third one, but happily on not cameo-ing in the new film. This is not necessarily a recommendation, but maybe give this one another look with an open mind.

Finding Dory

Finding Dory ~ The general parallels to the Star Wars franchise are hard to ignore here in this sequel to Finding Nemo. In the original movie it was a quest, a learning journey, with few signs of seriousness or darkness - not to say it wasn't serious - but this was a different movie than its sequel. Nemo was about parenting and about learning, but Dory gets downright dark and serious, much like The Empire Strikes Back. The fish have grown up.

We all laughed at the character of Dory, voiced by Ellen Degeneres, and her extremely short-term memory in the first film. As long as you don't know someone like that, or think about how she got that way, it's funny, but really, it's quite tragic. We find that like Marlin (Albert Brooks) lost his son Nemo and went to search for him, ultimately finding him - Dory wandered away from her parents, and never found them again, and never knew if they were looking for her. When you really think about it, it gives a whole new meaning to the film's title, Finding Dory.

The film begins with her losing her parents (or her parents losing her) in the past, then in the present day, follows her journey from there. After remembering one thing, she is off to first find her parents, and then save her friends. It's a fun road trip, but as I said, a bit darker than its predecessor.

I've been a fan of writer/director Andrew Stanton (also the voice of Crush) since John Carter, so I'll watch just about anything he's involved in. This was no disappointment, highly recommended, but be warned, tears alert. Also, don't forget to watch Piper, the Pixar short that accompanies it, it's awesome, as they all are.

Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

This is what we've have been waiting for since the last Harry Potter book, The Deathly Hallows and were teased at the end by the adult versions of our protagonists sending their children off to Hogwarts, finally a sequel, with Harry and friends as adults. Shamefully we don't get what we want, but something different and yet the same.

First a word about formatting, Harry Potter and Cursed Child: Parts One and Two is not a novel, nor is it written as a novel. It is a stage play and is written as such. Based on an original new story by Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling, with John Tiffany & Jack Thorne, with the play by Jack Thorne. Some folks might find it problematic to read in such a format, but it didn't bother me, and after a while, honestly, I didn't even notice it.

The story is that of Albus Severus Potter, the son of Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley, and Scorpius Malfoy, the son of Draco Malfoy. Neither fit in well at Hogwarts, neither are good at making friends, and so they become each other's friends - the sons of two enemies of their youth. While Albus struggles with living up to his father's reputation as the savior of all wizardom, Scorpius must deal with rumors that he is the son of Voldermort. A bond is formed between the boys, similar to that of Harry, Ron, and Hermione in the original books.

The tale is one of time travel and alternate timelines, of dire prophecies and dark possibilities. I won't give any more away, but I will say it starts slow, then about halfway through becomes a non-stop rollercoaster. I enjoyed it quite a bit, and felt it kept the spirit of the original stories alive. I hope there's more to come. Recommended.

For another view, check out Sarah Hawkins Miduski's thoughts on the book at Biff Bam Pop! right here.

Star Trek Beyond

Star Trek Beyond ~ The trailer for Star Trek Beyond is one of the things that kept me going when I spent this last December in the hospital. Beyond of course The Bride, my friends, my family, and a short video of my kitty Snowy, there was the first trailer that broke.

My friend Andy Burns posted it at Biff Bam Pop! on a day when I was feeling a bit better and I showed that YouTube clip set to the Beastie Boys' "Sabotage" on my iPhone to everyone who came into my room that day. I was psyched. One reason I was going to get out of that hellhole was certainly to see Star Trek Beyond in July.

It's July, and I'm out. I saw it, and I loved it. Star Trek Beyond is one of the three best movies out this year so far. And the other two - Captain America: Civil War and The Legend of Tarzan respectively - actually have a lot in common with Star Trek Beyond.

Like Civil War, this carefully structured script by Simon Pegg and Doug Jung, gives all of the many characters in this venerable cast equal time. Everyone has something to do and no one gets the short end of the stick. No matter who your favorite is, he or she gets a spotlight. Speaking of the script, Pegg and Jung are masterful in creating adversaries and situations that are absolutely geared to defeat the crew of the Enterprise, but never once does it degenerate into a when-is-it-time-for-the-good-guys-to-win scenario. There is no desperation, we are always rooting for our heroes.

And while we're on the topic of heroes, the similarities to Tarzan become apparent when as a viewer I realized that this was not the new crew, or new actors, but the real thing. This was Star Trek, and it was bringing it for a new generation without losing that which made it cool to begin with. I not only loved the traditional characters, but the new ones as well, and look forward to a fourth installment - something I could not have said after Into Darkness sadly.

This new Trek was fun, exciting, and triumphant. Highly recommended, and worth living for.

Sharknado: The 4th Awakens

Sharknado: The 4th Awakens ~ Hey folks, it's that time of year again, in what has become an annual tradition, it's Sharknado time again. Unlike lightning, the Sharknado can strike once, twice, three times, and now a fourth. Can Thunder Levin and The Asylum keep it going for a fourth installment? I think that's a no-brainer, but that's the kind of fun Sharknado is.

After an amazing Star Wars opening with the scrolling introduction off into the stars, we learn that it's now five years later from the end of Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!. There are no more Sharknadoes thanks to AstroX run by Tommy Davidson, who has now put their space money into a clean energy, and a Shark World hotel in Las Vegas. It's just too bad that our hero Fin Shepherd, played by Ian Ziering is also headed there for a family reunion. Predictably the fun starts very quickly, with a dust devil made of sharks. Yes, a dust devil, made, of sharks. Just go with it, folks.

This sandstorm full of sharks is apparently possible because it has no water, what Astro X was capable of preventing. As long as there's no water, they can't stop these storms. So the storm chasing Fin and his family morphs as it tracks him across the United States, changing into a boulder-nado, a fire-nado, a twine-nado, and finally a nuke-nado before Fin has a final showdown with the shark-filled beast at Niagara Falls, but not before it leaves a trail of destruction in its path.

The guest star parade is incessant, much like the window cameos in the 1966 "Batman" TV series, everyone wants to be part of Sharknado. "The Today Show" hosts are back, as are Jedward, joining, among many, many others like Vince Neil of Motley Crue, Wayne Newton, Cheryl Tiegs, Gilbert Gottfried as Ron McDonald (insert your own joke), Dog the Bounty Hunter, Dr. Drew Pinsky, Lloyd Kaufman, Carrot Top, Paul Shaffer, Corey Taylor of Slipknot, Seth Rollins, Jillian Barberie, Adrian Zmed, and Christine, Stephen King's possessed 1958 Plymouth Fury.

On the minus side, the Xfinity X1 commercials within the movie itself were just embarrassing. Dodge was obvious product placement, but at least their commercial outside the flick were amusing. Really, Xfinity, really?

This one has it all - pirate ships, shark-bergs, cyborg Tara Reid, shark-fribulators, a "Baywatch" reunion, and Gary Busey and David Hasselhoff. I loved the comic book credit sequence, and I even loved the Tara Reid homage to the cover of Action Comics #1. The movie is just fun, and if it has any flaws (other than Xfinity) it's where this Sharknado takes itself seriously or gets caught up in its own franchise continuity. Otherwise it's awesome. Bring on Sharknado 5!

Terminator Genisys

Terminator Genisys ~ There's a joke we have frequently when I run superhero role-playing games, because it's a storytelling device I use so often, and that's "Time travel makes my head hurt." The line is even spoken in this film. That's pretty much the phrase that best describes Terminator Genisys, because its continuity exists in a reality where things have been so messed up by repeated time travel that no one can keep the 'real' reality straight any longer.

We've got at least four movies and a short-lived TV series full of continuity that has been changed and reset more times than a videogame. Play. Reset. Play. Over and over again so that much of what you know is different every time you hit the reset button. Add to that the concept of alternate timelines, alternate pasts, and alternate futures, it just gets worse. For all those "Doctor Who" fans out there quoting David Tennant's 'timey-wimey' monologue, you get the picture.

Kyle Reese and Sarah Connor are still trying to destroy Skynet to prevent the machines from killing the human race, and a variety of Terminators are out to get them. That's all still true, it's the rules and variables that are different, and of course it's been updated. There are surprises, young Arnold, old Arnold, Lee Byung-hun as a T-1000, and... well, that would be telling. But then again, that's one of the big problems with this flick, all the big surprises were given away in the trailers.

Like earlier Terminator films, it's action propelled, thrills as heroes race against time, and stunts and special effects galore. Arnold Schwarzenegger is perfect, former Doctor Who Matt Smith (billed as Matthew Smith) rocked, and JK Simmons is fun in his much-too-small role. All are good except for the real lynchpin of the flick - Emilia Clarke, the Kalissi from "Game of Thrones," as Sarah Connor, is worse than bad, she's completely unbelievable. HBO has her right, the less dialogue, the better the performance.

I really could have done without the 'lesson' that technology is bad for us, and that being plugged in and online is a bad thing. Perhaps that is another reason this flick did not do as well as it could have - the anti-internet message of the Genisys application. Bad idea, folks, don't alienate the young demographic, don't bite the hand that feeds...

Here's the bottom line. I saw this flick for free on the TV loop in my stateroom of a recent cruise. It was enjoyable for free to watch as I pleased or not. If I'd had to pay for it, I think I might have been mad. See at your own risk.

Paul Blart Mall Cop 2

Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 ~ The film seems to take the first few minutes to completely undo the happy endings of its predecessor, almost as if it didn't want to think about it, or acknowledge it, or possibly the flick was written without knowledge of the first movie. This struck me as a bit odd as both were written by star Kevin James and frequent collaborator Nick Bakay. It's okay however, as this is a whole new adventure for Paul Blart.

Despite its juvenile comedy reputation, I was quite fond of the first Paul Blart Mall Cop movie, with its cunningly subtle remaking of Die Hard. In this installment, six years after the original, Kevin James' Blart has been invited to a security officers convention in Las Vegas. He thinks he'll be a star because of his actions in the first movie, but that was a long time ago. He's joined by a cadre of oddballs in his field, including his former "King of Queens" cohort Gary Valentine with a very disturbing hairpiece.

Besides dealing with his daughter trying to leave the nest, a less than exciting B plot, there is also something funny going on at the Wynn Hotel (getting lots of free publicity), as a gang of art thieves are planning a major heist. Yeah, hilarity ensues, and only Paul Blart Mall Cop and his new comrades can save the day. Kevin James is adequate, Valentine steals all the scenes he's in, but Ana Gasteyer and Loni Love are criminally underused here.

I did have a hearty laugh a few times at Blart's comic book superhero kryptonite weakness of hypoglycemia. And I loved the Mini-Kiss cameo. Beyond that however, this was still a decently amusing passage of time. The heist scenes are top notch. Good for the kids.

Don't forget to check out my interview with the director of this flick, Andy Fickman, here at Biff Bam Pop!, and be sure to see his new movie, The Scout's Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse.

Sampling the Season

"The Muppets" - I have to admit I wasn't expecting much from this after hearing the premise. The idea of an environment like "The Office" behind the scenes of a Muppet show didn't do much for me, especially with the reality television one-on-one diary room moments with the cast. I would rather see a Muppet show than behind the scenes with a Muppet show.

I needn't have worried. Sure, if still like to see the real "Up Late with Miss Piggy" show, but this was still darned good. We got to see deeper into the characters of some of the Muppets. The bits with Kermit and Miss Piggy were very funny and quite insightful despite the horror they appeared to be in the pre-show hype. And the Fozzie bear jokes in the first episode were hilarious. Thumbs up, I really enjoyed this and can't wait for more.

"Limitless" - This series, like a couple others this season, is based on a movie, in this case one by the same name from 2011 with Bradley Cooper, which in turn was based on the novel "The Dark Fields" by Alan Glynn. Basically there's a smart pill called NZT that does a Lucy on its user, 100% of their brain cells and all that nonsense, only a bit more believable. Oh and unlike most movie to TV products, this isn't a retelling or reimagining, this is a sequel to the film. Bradley Cooper is even in the first episode.


Now, much like "The Muppets," the hype for "Limitless" was more than a bit misleading. The ads made it seem a lot like the Golden Age superhero Hourman, one of my favorites, who gained enhanced speed, strength, and endurance on one hour after taking a pill he called Miraclo. What makes this sadder is the implied potential promise of an "Hourman" show on the CW spinning out of "Arrow" where super-soldiers were created by a drug called Mirakuru. That's not "Limitless," sad face.

That said, it wasn't bad, but it did have the same stink of things like "Journeyman," "Revolution," and sadly, the new series "Blindspot," from the folks who brought us "Arrow," "The Flash," and "Supergirl." While it may be temporarily good, there is an underlying overarcing story that will probably never be resolved. I can't invest that kind of time, so unfortunately "Limitless" and "Blindspot" may be on the losing end of this stick. If they're that good, maybe I'll binge later, but for now, no.

Monsters: Dark Continent

Monsters: Dark Continent ~ I watched the first Monsters film because I was intrigued to see the work of writer/director Gareth Edwards, specifically to see what has gotten him the gig of the then-yet-to-be reboot of Godzilla. I was not impressed. I was more than a little disturbed by the monster love scene, and Edwards' aversion to showing us the monsters bled over into his Godzilla.

So it was with great trepidation that I watched the Gareth Edwards-less sequel, Monsters: Dark Continent. While the original was a bad human story, commentating on the US immigration policy, with the monsters as both allegory and backdrop, the sequel is something far beyond, and yet the same. The monsters have invaded the Middle East, and the US is fighting them, but there's still a war going on.

While we actually do get to see the monsters this time, the movie is not about them this time either. It takes place in the Monsters world, but this is Full Metal Jacket meets The Hurt Locker. This is a war movie, with far more in common with the films above or Three Kings than any kaiju eiga you could name.

The special effects are good, better for a war movie than a monster movie, but apparently they made their choice. It seems fairly obvious that someone (writer/director Tom Green, no, not that Tom Green) wanted to make a war movie, and used the contractual sequel for Monsters as the vehicle. I really feel like I've been invited to a steak dinner, but ended up at a vegetarian restaurant.

In Like Our Man Flint

First I have to confess it's been at least four decades since I've seen either of the Derek Flint movies. When I saw they were both OnDemand (as opposed to one or the other), I decided it was time to sit down and refresh my memory.

All my life I have loved the James Bond movie series, and with that, also the numerous copycats, homages, and parodies. So I dug Flint as a kid, but I recall liking Matt Helm a lot better, and even today, Dean Martin's swaggering spy is a fave and a delight. As I got ready to watch the two Flint films, I wondered if it would change my mind.

James Coburn's Derek Flint is a retired super spy from Z.O.W.I.E. (Zonal Organization for World Intelligence and Espionage - you gotta love those 1960s acronyms) who is now living the life of a classic playboy. In the first film, 1966's Our Man Flint, he's brought out of his retirement to stop Galaxy, a cabal of evil scientists who want to rule the world.

One thing I enjoyed, and wished more movies would do this with their protagonist, is that much like Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark, we are shown and know everything we need to know about Derek Flint in the first ten minutes. He's a man of culture, of intelligence, of mad skills, has an affinity for women, a dislike for his boss, and a wry sense of humor. Speaking of his boss, the legendary Lee J. Cobb has great chemistry with Coburn and it's a delight when the two are on screen together.

There are some clever plot twists, colorful sets, cheesy 1960s effects, beautiful women, an early cool jazzy score by Jerry Goldsmith, and lots of silly spy gadgets and cliches. The flick is dated, yes, and the plot falls apart if you think too hard, but it is parody after all. Highlights include Bond wannabe Agent 0008 and a baddie named Hans Gruber, yeah, as in Die Hard like twenty years later.

If you look close you'll see Edward Mulhare from "Knight Rider," and Charmin pitchman Mr. Whipple, and if you listen close to the President's voice - yeah, that's the Green Hornet himself, Van Williams, imitating then-Prez Lyndon B. Johnson.

The sequel In Like Flint was released a little over a year later. Even though many of the same folks are involved, this tale of a spa company taking over the world and turning the patriarchy into a matriarchy (sooo sexist and dated), is a weak sister to the original. Notably not as clever, one glaring difference is the music. In Our Man, music moved along the slow parts, and here many of the slow bits go silent.

Lee J. Cobb is toothless and nothing like his character in the original, and Flint is too nice. I found myself disliking them both whereas I loved their performances in Our Man. It's like the first movie was "Batman" clever but the second was unfunny like the later Pink Panther films, trying but never quite making it. Not to be mean, but I know why there wasn't a third Flint flick. And speaking of "Batman," look for pre-Batgirl Yvonne Craig as the ballerina in this one.

After this double feature, I would have to say I still prefer Matt Helm, and I could probably wait another four decades to see these two movies again. Now I know why the only memory I have of them previously is the sound of the ring of the President's phone.

Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!

With Sharknado, the third time is the charm, and by now, let's face it, The Asylum is just having fun. After protecting Los Angeles and New York City in Sharknado and Sharknado 2: The Second One, Ian Ziering's Fin Shepherd has to save the entire east coast, from Washington DC (which gets demolished better than it did in either Independence Day or Mars Attacks) to Orlando. Camp silliness rules, and guest stars and product placement are everywhere. Could you expect anything else? Truly, Thunder Levin and The Asylum are laughing all the way to the bank.

The opening destruction of Washington was just as exciting as the James Bond intro it was trying to emulate. It was funny, thrilling, and ridiculous - and it sets the mood for the rest of this flick. Be warned, despite the inherent silliness, Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No! is remarkably plot heavy. While Tara Reid, Bo Derek, and the rest of Fin's non-acting family tour and promote Universal Orlando - he's making his way there from DC in an armored Shazambago.

Two of the best things about this flick are the drivers of that Winnebago - Cassie Scerbo as Nova from the first Sharknado and her sidekick Frankie Muniz. I'll take Cassie over Tara any day myself. Also look for cameos by Lou Ferrigno, Ann Coulter, Michael Bolton, Anthony Weiner, Chris Jericho, George R.R. Martin, Penn and Teller, Ne-Yo, and hell yes, even David Hasselhoff.

Like its two predecessors, this flick is a hell of a lot of fun from start to finish, and as it aired last night, plans were finalized for not just Sharknado 4, but this being a regular event. I'm down. And don't forget to vote in the Twitter contest for #AprilLives or #AprilDies... Why does this remind me of Jason Todd? Semper paratus!

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes ~ I have talked about my love for the Planet of the Apes movies before, actually more than once. And while Rise of the Planet of the Apes, the second attempt to reboot the series was a pleasant and superior surprise, I still had some reservations. I shouldn't have worried at all. Dawn is even better than Rise.

If you know the saga of the Planet of the Apes, you know that Rise and Dawn are covering old territory. We already know the history, we know what happens, and that's the danger of any prequels. And even though the movies in the original series, Conquest and Battle, are by far the most inferior, and provide the basis for Rise and Dawn, I have much praise for Dawn of the Planet of the Apes.

Once again, Andy Serkis and the CGI portraying Caesar, the first leader of the Apes, are the stars over and above anyone or anything else in this flick. Gary Oldman is wasted for the five to ten minutes he appears, Keri Russell continues to age badly, and Kirk Acevedo is a master of playing the same character in every project he's in. Harsh, yes, but those are the only bad things about this movie. The rest is near perfect.

The opening, outside the establishing narration of a world a decade after the last film, is without traditional dialogue. The Apes live in peace in their own home, speaking in a combination of simple pantomime and crude American Sign Language. Caesar himself only speaks aloud once man intrudes on their idyllic life, but don't be fooled, the other apes speak as well. And these apes, CGI and otherwise, out-act the human players.

There is no black and white, or good and evil here. It's man vs. ape, it's true, but factions within each group are at war as well. This tale of trust and war and family is set against another amazing score by my favorite composer Michael Giacchino. He hits all the right notes for the appropriate emotional impact. I've already gotten the soundtrack from iTunes I was so impressed.

Whether you're a fan of either Planet of the Apes franchise, or not, this entry is highly recommended. I can't wait for 2017's War of the Planet of the Apes.