Sharknado: The 4th Awakens

Sharknado: The 4th Awakens ~ Hey folks, it's that time of year again, in what has become an annual tradition, it's Sharknado time again. Unlike lightning, the Sharknado can strike once, twice, three times, and now a fourth. Can Thunder Levin and The Asylum keep it going for a fourth installment? I think that's a no-brainer, but that's the kind of fun Sharknado is.

After an amazing Star Wars opening with the scrolling introduction off into the stars, we learn that it's now five years later from the end of Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!. There are no more Sharknadoes thanks to AstroX run by Tommy Davidson, who has now put their space money into a clean energy, and a Shark World hotel in Las Vegas. It's just too bad that our hero Fin Shepherd, played by Ian Ziering is also headed there for a family reunion. Predictably the fun starts very quickly, with a dust devil made of sharks. Yes, a dust devil, made, of sharks. Just go with it, folks.

This sandstorm full of sharks is apparently possible because it has no water, what Astro X was capable of preventing. As long as there's no water, they can't stop these storms. So the storm chasing Fin and his family morphs as it tracks him across the United States, changing into a boulder-nado, a fire-nado, a twine-nado, and finally a nuke-nado before Fin has a final showdown with the shark-filled beast at Niagara Falls, but not before it leaves a trail of destruction in its path.

The guest star parade is incessant, much like the window cameos in the 1966 "Batman" TV series, everyone wants to be part of Sharknado. "The Today Show" hosts are back, as are Jedward, joining, among many, many others like Vince Neil of Motley Crue, Wayne Newton, Cheryl Tiegs, Gilbert Gottfried as Ron McDonald (insert your own joke), Dog the Bounty Hunter, Dr. Drew Pinsky, Lloyd Kaufman, Carrot Top, Paul Shaffer, Corey Taylor of Slipknot, Seth Rollins, Jillian Barberie, Adrian Zmed, and Christine, Stephen King's possessed 1958 Plymouth Fury.

On the minus side, the Xfinity X1 commercials within the movie itself were just embarrassing. Dodge was obvious product placement, but at least their commercial outside the flick were amusing. Really, Xfinity, really?

This one has it all - pirate ships, shark-bergs, cyborg Tara Reid, shark-fribulators, a "Baywatch" reunion, and Gary Busey and David Hasselhoff. I loved the comic book credit sequence, and I even loved the Tara Reid homage to the cover of Action Comics #1. The movie is just fun, and if it has any flaws (other than Xfinity) it's where this Sharknado takes itself seriously or gets caught up in its own franchise continuity. Otherwise it's awesome. Bring on Sharknado 5!

Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!

With Sharknado, the third time is the charm, and by now, let's face it, The Asylum is just having fun. After protecting Los Angeles and New York City in Sharknado and Sharknado 2: The Second One, Ian Ziering's Fin Shepherd has to save the entire east coast, from Washington DC (which gets demolished better than it did in either Independence Day or Mars Attacks) to Orlando. Camp silliness rules, and guest stars and product placement are everywhere. Could you expect anything else? Truly, Thunder Levin and The Asylum are laughing all the way to the bank.

The opening destruction of Washington was just as exciting as the James Bond intro it was trying to emulate. It was funny, thrilling, and ridiculous - and it sets the mood for the rest of this flick. Be warned, despite the inherent silliness, Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No! is remarkably plot heavy. While Tara Reid, Bo Derek, and the rest of Fin's non-acting family tour and promote Universal Orlando - he's making his way there from DC in an armored Shazambago.

Two of the best things about this flick are the drivers of that Winnebago - Cassie Scerbo as Nova from the first Sharknado and her sidekick Frankie Muniz. I'll take Cassie over Tara any day myself. Also look for cameos by Lou Ferrigno, Ann Coulter, Michael Bolton, Anthony Weiner, Chris Jericho, George R.R. Martin, Penn and Teller, Ne-Yo, and hell yes, even David Hasselhoff.

Like its two predecessors, this flick is a hell of a lot of fun from start to finish, and as it aired last night, plans were finalized for not just Sharknado 4, but this being a regular event. I'm down. And don't forget to vote in the Twitter contest for #AprilLives or #AprilDies... Why does this remind me of Jason Todd? Semper paratus!

Making Cool Cooler

Writers strike or not, there's a new show coming to NBC in February. Well, maybe not a show yet, but a telemovie pilot destined for series-hood, and it's also not that new either. Sunday, February 17, 2008, "Knight Rider" returns to television.

The good news is that this is not a horrific re-imagining like NBC's recent shots at "The Bionic Woman" and "Battlestar Galactica" - this is an update and a sequel to the successful 1980s action/scifi series that launched David Hasselhoff's career. The Hoff even makes an appearance in the pilot as his character Michael Knight.

While some will say Hasselhoff was the star of "Knight Rider," those of us who know better will tell you it was really the KITT-2000, the supercar of which the Hoff was only the driver. KITT's voice was done by the silky and sarcastic William Daniels and had a cool Cylon eye in its Pontiac Trans Am hood. Among other things, KITT could drive itself and was a certified artificial intelligence - the epitome of 1980s TV cool.

But it's not the 1980s anymore, so how do you make cool cooler? The new KITT-3000 is a Ford Mustang with an artificial intelligence that has cult favorite Will Arnett's voice and nanotech abilities. Yep, that's right, this is one badass car o' the future - not only can it repair itself, it can change shape and color at will. Can't wait for Feb.

As for a story, it sounds pretty typical, but storytelling was never the forte on this show, the car was. It's obviously a sequel to the original series, but let's just hope they ignore previous attempts like "2000," "2010" and *groan* "Team Knight Rider."