A Million Ways to Die in the West

A Million Ways to Die in the West ~ Steven Spielberg once predicted the death of the superhero movie, saying it would soon go the way of the Western. This comes from the man who co-created Indiana Jones, a character that is essentially a superhero, lacking only a mask. It wasn't that he said it that bothered me, it was the derision with which he said it. Bad form, Mr. Spielberg.

I think it's a matter of quality not genre. Bad superhero movies may well go the way of bad Westerns, but good movies, no matter the genre, will last. When it comes to bad movies, only the really, really bad ones are remembered. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, anyone? And we shall not even speak of Batman v Superman…

They still make good Westerns, just sometimes they're in disguise. They wear the trappings of the South like Django Unchained, Japanese theatre like Bunraku, the post-apocalypse like Mad Max, or simple covered in dirt like "Deadwood." I left the remakes of True Grit and 3:10 to Yuma out because I didn't particularly like them, no matter how critically acclaimed they were.

And sometimes a good Western, like in the case of Seth MacFarlane's A Million Ways to Die in the West, it's shrouded in shameless inappropriate humor. I would never have thought it before seeing it, but I loved this flick. Co-written, produced, and directed by MacFarlane, this movie has that old time Western feel, but with that raunchy fall down funny vibe of Blazing Saddles, and even has the dirty authenticity of "Deadwood."

From the start with the opening credits sequence, MacFarlane sets the stage for this film as a classic Western. Old fashioned titles matched with sweeping colorful scenery of the Old West, overlaid with the beautiful score of Joel McNeely, made for an opening that could have been swiped from a sixties John Ford epic. I watched it twice. That good.

Once it's over though, the trademark MacFarlane humor kicks in almost immediately. This is no Blazing Saddles but it's real close, and if you liked Ted or "Family Guy," you will love this. This movie is a gift for Western fans, and piss-your-pants funny for comedy fans. Recommended.

Arrow S04 E07: Brotherhood

Before we go anywhere this week, I just want to note why the emergence of John Diggle's brother as an actual character on "Arrow" is so weird. Diggle was named in homage of Andy Diggle, one of the Green Arrow writers in the comics. When the opportunity came up to give Diggle some backstory, someone clever behind the scenes thought it would be fun to give him a dead brother named Andy.

Now, this brother is figuring heavily in the current storyline, and it's odd to keep hearing the name Andy Diggle and seeing an actor play him. This is a step beyond the Neal Adams remark a few weeks back, because I doubt we'll ever see Neal. The Andy Diggle thing is different.

Speaking of homages, the trail to find where the H.I.V.E. ghosts are coming from leads to a raid on another corporate entity peddling in super science. Since it doesn't matter the name, at least they decided not to tease us with a real DC Universe company this time like Kord Industries to get our hopes up. This one is Wolfman Biologics, named for writer Marv Wolfman, who did his share of Speedy stories during his reign on New Teen Titans. Ironically, it's also where Diggle finds his brother.

Andy Diggle is alive, and working for H.I.V.E. To get to the point where we find any real information about it is a long road. This episode seems to be about quick action scenes to get to the slow dreary soap opera parts - as opposed to the other way around. Thea is juggling an undercover romance (again?) with Davis, and dealing with her Lazarus Pit blood lust (again??), although it's always nice to see John Barrowman.

The Andy thing brings back the annoying bugaboo between Oliver and Diggle over family and secrets. It seems that the H.I.V.E. ghosts are definitely enhanced by a drug, as well as bound by Darhk's suggestion - and probably dead as well. Ray, coming out his back-from-the-dead funk, pinpoints their home base. It was a thrill to see the Atom join the fight after so long.

The big deal however is Darhk's mini-confrontation of the week. He corners Thea, noting her fighting style as that of R'as Al Ghul, then flips it by asking how her father is. But the whammy is that when he tries to take her heart a la Mola Ram, he surprisingly can't. Lazarus Pit immunity maybe? Weirdly though, the encounter took away Thea's blood lust.

Flashback Island has unearthed a revelation for me in that boss man Reiter was referenced as 'Baron.' Now I am able to place him in the DC Comics mythos. This is the TV version of World War II baddie Baron Blitzkrieg. This Nazi super-villain clashed with the All-Star Squadron frequently, as well as Earth-Two versions of Wonder Woman and Superman. In comics it should be noted the Baron never really had an interest in magic, and on "Arrow," he won't be going by his Blitzkrieg monicker.

Next: the big Arrow/Flash crossover, when Heroes Join Forces, against Vandal Savage!



And then there's this...

In Like Our Man Flint

First I have to confess it's been at least four decades since I've seen either of the Derek Flint movies. When I saw they were both OnDemand (as opposed to one or the other), I decided it was time to sit down and refresh my memory.

All my life I have loved the James Bond movie series, and with that, also the numerous copycats, homages, and parodies. So I dug Flint as a kid, but I recall liking Matt Helm a lot better, and even today, Dean Martin's swaggering spy is a fave and a delight. As I got ready to watch the two Flint films, I wondered if it would change my mind.

James Coburn's Derek Flint is a retired super spy from Z.O.W.I.E. (Zonal Organization for World Intelligence and Espionage - you gotta love those 1960s acronyms) who is now living the life of a classic playboy. In the first film, 1966's Our Man Flint, he's brought out of his retirement to stop Galaxy, a cabal of evil scientists who want to rule the world.

One thing I enjoyed, and wished more movies would do this with their protagonist, is that much like Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark, we are shown and know everything we need to know about Derek Flint in the first ten minutes. He's a man of culture, of intelligence, of mad skills, has an affinity for women, a dislike for his boss, and a wry sense of humor. Speaking of his boss, the legendary Lee J. Cobb has great chemistry with Coburn and it's a delight when the two are on screen together.

There are some clever plot twists, colorful sets, cheesy 1960s effects, beautiful women, an early cool jazzy score by Jerry Goldsmith, and lots of silly spy gadgets and cliches. The flick is dated, yes, and the plot falls apart if you think too hard, but it is parody after all. Highlights include Bond wannabe Agent 0008 and a baddie named Hans Gruber, yeah, as in Die Hard like twenty years later.

If you look close you'll see Edward Mulhare from "Knight Rider," and Charmin pitchman Mr. Whipple, and if you listen close to the President's voice - yeah, that's the Green Hornet himself, Van Williams, imitating then-Prez Lyndon B. Johnson.

The sequel In Like Flint was released a little over a year later. Even though many of the same folks are involved, this tale of a spa company taking over the world and turning the patriarchy into a matriarchy (sooo sexist and dated), is a weak sister to the original. Notably not as clever, one glaring difference is the music. In Our Man, music moved along the slow parts, and here many of the slow bits go silent.

Lee J. Cobb is toothless and nothing like his character in the original, and Flint is too nice. I found myself disliking them both whereas I loved their performances in Our Man. It's like the first movie was "Batman" clever but the second was unfunny like the later Pink Panther films, trying but never quite making it. Not to be mean, but I know why there wasn't a third Flint flick. And speaking of "Batman," look for pre-Batgirl Yvonne Craig as the ballerina in this one.

After this double feature, I would have to say I still prefer Matt Helm, and I could probably wait another four decades to see these two movies again. Now I know why the only memory I have of them previously is the sound of the ring of the President's phone.

The Mercury Men

Aside from the occasional mini-series, a Saturday night Asylum movie just for laughs, and of course, "Warehouse 13," I don't watch all that much Syfy Network anymore. I gave "Alphas" a momentary spin but it just didn't keep my interest.

I do however have the Syfy app on my iPhone and there were some very cool previews on there. The one I was most excited about was a black and white movie serial-ish thing called "The Mercury Men." I couldn't wait for this thing to air, as I would be riveted in front of my TV. Sadly as the airdate got closer, I discovered it was a webseries, not for TV. Disappointed a little, I was still excited.

So when the day came I watched each five to ten-minute installment with anticipation. It was everything I thought it would be - black and white movie serial goodness. The brainchild of writer/director Chris Preksta, The Mercury Men is a wonderful sci-fi adventure in the style of Flash Gordon or Buck Rogers or any of the rayguns and rocketships serials back in the day.

When a off hours office worker is attacked by glowing men who shoot lightning from their hands and is turn saved by a cross between Indiana Jones, Buck Rogers and Airboy - the rollercoaster of action and suspense begins and doesn't stop. Have I mentioned how much I love this?

Right now, you can see "The Mercury Men" here, or OnDemand, although I wish Syfy would just put it on the air, or better yet, make it a regular series. How about it? In the meantime, everyone else check out this great web series.

Ghost Town

Ghost Town ~ David Koepp has written some amazing movies, some of my faves like the most recent Shadow flick and the first Spider-Man, but for the most part he leaves me cold. The last Indiana Jones movie and the Tom Cruise War of the Worlds spring immediately to mind. So it’s with trepidation I watched Ghost Town which he wrote and directed.

Alternately I love Ricky Gervais, but only from his standup and especially HBO’s “Extras.” Don’t even ask about “The Office.” I have yet to be able to sit through an entire episode of either series from either side of the Atlantic. Some folks love it, but it continues to elude me.

Ricky however, completely carries this film. Without him and his caustic personality this would be a painful and unfunny Lifetime reject of a telemovie. This comedic play on the concept from The Sixth Sense wears pretty thin without him to hold it together. I’ve never seen Greg Kinnear more annoying, and Tea Leoni’s talents are wasted in her role.

To me, there’s no secret why this heartless comedy that tries too hard and is a tad bit predictable bombed at the box office. Worth a look only for Ricky Gervais fans.

She

This 1935 film means a lot to me and I’m really happy I finally got to see it. One of the few times my father took an interest in my writing was when he suggested I see this flick. It must have been at some point when I was watching Raiders of the Lost Ark or Star Wars, and he said, “If you really want to see a good adventure story, you should see She, the original, from when I was a kid.” At some point when I was older I picked up a collection of H. Rider Haggard novels, and I immediately devoured it. Asking my father about it however, I learned he’d never read the books, and had only seen the original film version of She.

Finding that version has been a long road. Even when I worked in video retail, it was considered a ‘lost’ film, with only sparse footage remaining. It was made in 1935 but was seen by a whole new generation in re-release, double-billed with The Last Days of Pompeii (also from ’35) in 1948. Recently restored by Ray Harryhausen, believe it or not, from a print that Buster Keaton had in his garage - it is now available on DVD. Oddly it was originally meant to be a color film but because of budget restraints done in black and white. The restored cut includes a colorized version that uses actual scenery and wardrobe orders to make the colors match the originals.

Now that I’ve seen it I know what my father was talking about. If he had ever seen Raiders of the Lost Ark he might have marveled at the special effects, but the rest of it would be old hat to him because of She. The sets are amazing, especially the hall of the kings, and the dance number/ceremony that takes place there is breathtaking if dated. Max Steiner, composer for 1933’s King Kong, scored the terrific soundtrack, one of his best. Randolph Scott, mostly known for his cowboy flicks, is our hero in the mode that would later spawn Indiana Jones among others, and the startling beauty Helen Gahagan Douglass plays the title role. It was the only film appearance for the Broadway singer who later became a Congresswoman.

She was adapted by Ruth Rose (the writer of King Kong) from the Haggard novel, and produced by the legendary Merion C. Cooper, father of Kong. The action is a step above that of the time, no simple movie serial with a budget is this. The saber tooth tiger and avalanche scenes are great. This is one of the great adventure flicks of not only its time, but, dare I say it, all time. Highly recommended.

Indy 4: The Ride

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, besides having three too many words in the title ("the Kingdom of" should be removed in my opinion), is more of a ride than a film. In fact, I suspect that someone, probably Disney or Universal, have one in the works already, but there's really no need. The film is the ride. And trust me, it's a better ride than a film.

We pick up with Indy in 1957, and we know it's 1957 because we are hammered over the head with this fact several times. The rock 'n' roll, the atomic bomb tests, the Cold War and the McCarthyism of the time are beaten into us enough to make it a distraction more than a background. It seems to me that if George Lucas wanted to make a film about America in the 1950s he should have just done it and left Indiana Jones out of it. Of course, however, with our principal character, and the actor Harrison Ford, feeling and looking his age, the time really had to be some time in the 1950s.

The rest of the cast is really outshown by brunette Soviet psychic spy Cate Blanchett. She is more than suitably evil and engaging. The screen lights up when Cate's on it - an excellent foil opposite Ford, who for the first time in years (maybe since the last Indy flick) isn't playing wooden and unlikable on the screen. Oh, Karen Allen is back again too, John Hurt does his best catatonia and schizophrenia, and then there's Shia LaBeouf, the homeless man's Marlon Brando imitation. Sorry, for me he justs gets more annoying in every movie I see him in.

Storywise, what story there is, seems to indicate that George Lucas has been listening to far too much Coast to Coast AM. This shift in the Indiana Jones series from Christian mythology to crypto-mythology is especially jarring. For me, the mix of Indy with aliens is akin to mixing fudge and mayo. It ain't pretty. This flick is a mix and match nightmare of the paranormal culture, throwing in such aspects as Roswell, Nasca, Eldorado, among others to tell Lucas' tale of the crystal skulls.

That's not to say that it's all bad. There are interesting nods and winks to "The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles" and Star Wars, and we even catch a peek at the Ark of the Covenant in a loose end that could, if pressured by box office success, lead to a sequel. There are a few memorable lines, and a sweet ending, but in my opinion, this is the weakest of the series. Still, see the flick, and ride the ride - it's still worth it.

Quickies 2-9-2007

Firewall - I have to wonder if Harrison Ford got the memo that no one cares anymore? When was the last time he had a hit movie? It might be time to make a new Indiana Jones or Star Wars flick before it's too late because he's not aging gracefully. Sean Connery is hotter than Ford at this point. Dude is looking old and not able to do the action hero anymore. Not that Firewall, a cutting edge bank heist thriller, has cast him in that role, but he's not even cut out for the passive role he has here. The flick does have its share of suspense and tense moments but Ford doesn't supply many of them. It might also be nice if all the loose ends were tied up at the end.

The Notorious Bettie Page - I've never been a hardcore fan of cheesecake or Bettie Page, but I know my share of the phenomenon from Dave Stevens art and working in a video store with a healthy old school burlesque collection. Gretchen Mol is beautiful and stunning, and her acting is top notch as well. Props to writer/director Mary Harron. Beautiful women and wondrous cinematography.

Oldboy and The Boondock Saints - Both of these flicks came highly recommended by friends. There are elements to them that I really liked but overall I was bored and disappointed. The latter was many levels more engaging than the former until its anticlimactic ending.