Howard the Duck

Back in the day, before the internet, when newspapers (yeah, remember them?) would do their occasional slow news day story on how comics weren't just for kids any more, there would always be certain elements brought up. First off, they'd have most of their facts wrong, second the headline would have a lame Batman '66 sound effect in the headline, and third, they'd be talking about one of three characters - the Shazam! Captain Marvel, Judge Dredd, or Howard the Duck. The thrust of the article was always comics are for adults now, wow, who woulda thunk it? with an undertone of old comics are worth money. Both of these myths helped to derail how comics are perceived today.

These inaccurate newspaper articles are where I first encountered Howard the Duck, usually on the cover of the first issue of his titular series, with a cigar in his mouth, a sword in his hand, and Spider-Man on the inset of the cover. There was also a scantily dressed woman behind him and the banner that read, "Trapped in a world he never made!" I had no idea at twelve what any of that meant. So I never picked up the book.

A duck in the mostly superhero Marvel Universe didn't make sense to me. Sure he had weird scifi fantasy origins but he first appeared in the Man-Thing horror comics, and Marvel horror wasn't something I'd pick up on until much later. Howard was just weird, he looked like Donald Duck from Hell, and of course now might be a good time to mention Disney (before they owned Marvel) sued to make Howard wear pants, removing some of the litigious similarities.

When the Howard the Duck comic strip showed up in my local paper (those things again?) I just didn't get it. I dismissed it as too smart for the room like Doonesbury or any of the other political stuff. Then came Iron Duck. This was the first issue of Howard the Duck I ever picked up, almost four years into his run. This parody of Iron Man was the reason I bought it, and therein I learned not just that Howard was a master of Quack Fu, but that his foe in that issue was a guy named Doctor Bong. This villain wore a bell on his head and hit it with his clapper hand to make horrible sounds. I was sold.

I guess by then I was old enough to get it, and after that I really dug Howard the Duck. I understood what a genius creator Steve Gerber was to create a character that only entertained, but also commented on society. This was so cool. And then Marvel took Howard away from Gerber in a web of legal complexity too big to get into here, and the Duck vanished for a bit. Little did I know that when Howard returned, it would get worse.

The late summer of 1986 saw the release of George Lucas' Howard the Duck, which was, believe it or not, Marvel's first theatrical release. Although Lucas had originally intended it to be animated, it was unfortunately live-action, which of course made the idea of a talking duck ridiculous. We ended up with a little person in a bad duck costume. Things did not get better from there.

Howard the Duck is frequently acknowledged as not only one of Lucas' biggest bombs, but also as one of the worst movies ever made. The film stars Lea Thompson as a barely recognizable Bev, Howard's human female companion, Tim Robbins as a scientist, and Jeffrey Jones as another scientist possessed by a Dark Overlord of the Universe, the villain of the piece. No one shines here, even Thompson who's trying awkwardly to start a musical career. Also Broadway's Chip Zien provides the voice of Howard. I think Ed Gale was in the duck suit.

The scientists are trying open up dimensional gateways, and end up pulling Howard from Duckworld, and also pulling in a cosmic nasty called the Dark Overlord of the Universe. The thrust of the movie is all about getting that genie back in the bottle to save the Earth. As if the duck suit isn't embarrassing enough, the opening credits sequence shows us quite a bit of Duckworld, which is filled with more embarrassing duck suits. The opener also features the sad John Barry score. It's good, but so wrong for the film. Apparently Barry thought he was scoring a slow noir or a sixties melodrama.

The more modern music of the film was one of the few things I did like. How could I not like a collaboration between Thomas Dolby and George Clinton, two of my faves? Dolby did most of the music, and even those songs attributed to Lea Thompson and her band 'Cherry Bomb.' Yeah, I confess, this is a guilty pleasure, but I dig the music. The soundtrack is no longer available but I have a few of them still.

I remembered hating this flick the first time I saw it back in 1986, and I have to say, it's still pretty bad the second time around. There's so much to struggle through - Howard as a lapsed rocker who becomes Bev's manager, their bizarre relationship that was made even more bizarre in the movie, and special effects nowhere near Lucasfilm's usual output. I only laughed once, when Jeffrey Jones says, in the Dark Overlord's voice, "She took my eggs." at a diner. It's become a running joke with friends ever since. And let's not even talk about Jeffrey Jones' hentai tongue.

Rumor says that overall Steve Gerber thought the essence of Howard and Bev made it into the film. Honestly I don't see it. I really don't see Howard at all, but if it's any consolation, I don't think I've seen the real Howard since the seventies in the comics, since Gerber left him. The film is not recommended, please do check out some of the original comics though.

Guardians of the Galaxy

Guardians of the Galaxy ~ First things first, there will be spoilers for the movie, so if you're looking for a spoiler-free review of Guardians of the Galaxy, that review can be found at Biff Bam Pop! right here, and really, what are you waiting for already? See the movie!

I should confess that these aren't my Guardians of the Galaxy in the movie. I first encountered the Guardians of the Galaxy back in the 1970s at the Berlin Auction, or the Berlin Farmers Market for the folks from Cherry Hill, at one of those newsstands where they would tear the tops of the covers off of comics and sell them three for a quarter. Sometimes the pickings would be sparse, and instead of a Flash or Justice League, you would end up getting something different that you didn't necessarily want. This is how stuff like Lois Lane or Tarzan Family or Daredevil would end up in your collection, ready to be traded at school for something you thought was better.

One of those books that I actually enjoyed and didn't trade was Marvel Presents #3, featuring the original Guardians of the Galaxy. I loved this book. Here the original and somewhat redesigned members of the team - Charlie-27 of Jupiter, Martinex of Pluto, Yondu of Alpha Centauri, and Vance Astro of Earth - were teamed with the cosmic-powered Starhawk to finish off the alien invaders, the Badoon, who had enslaved mankind. This was in the 30th century, and I was well aware of Marvel trying to parallel DC Comics' Legion of Super-Heroes, but I didn't care, this was cool. These heroes bounced around different titles throughout the 1970s before scoring their own series in the 1980s, before disappearing.

These new Guardians of the Galaxy were born in the fires of the Marvel Comics crossover event called Annihilation and its spin-offs and sequels. This event brainstormed by Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning took almost all of Marvel's space and cosmic heroes and wove all of their mythologies into one coherent continuity. And that is really what is so amazing about the movie. All of these characters have such continuity-heavy backgrounds in the comics, but in the film are presented with just what you need to know to enjoy the flick. It's magic, and serious props should go to James Gunn and Nicole Perlman.

Star-Lord and Rocket Raccoon were pretty much, to my knowledge at least, one-shot characters from the late 1970s. Thanos, Drax the Destroyer, Lady Gamora, Nebula and that bunch were all part of that weird 1970s cosmic epic involving Captain Mar-Vell and Adam Warlock by Jim Starlin before that. And Groot, well, Groot predates Marvel, going waaay back to Atlas Comics when Stan Lee and Jack Kirby were doing giant monster and alien invasion stories in the 1950s. Annihilation brought them together as a team before they came to the big screen. That's that, but as I said, everything you need to know about these characters is on the screen.

There are Easter eggs and tidbits from earlier Marvel movies in here, and it's a major bonus if you know about them, but you don't need to know anything to see and enjoy Guardians of the Galaxy. This could very well be the first Marvel movie for all the background needed. In other words, the fanboy and the fangirl can bring their significant others to this flick and they will enjoy it just as much as their partner.

You'll meet Star-Lord, played by Chris Pratt, playing his charm and charisma for all its worth. He's a funny leading man who will make you blow raspberries at that Robert Downey Jr. guy. He is the default leader of the rogues who become the Guardians. Zoe Saldana plays living weapon Gamora, with wrestler Dave Bautista (or is it Batista?  I've seen it spelled both ways) as the literal-minded Drax the Destroyer. The personality quirks of these two characters mixed with Star-Lord are part of what makes this flick so much fun.

The real fun with characters and interaction come from the two CGI entries Rocket and Groot. Rocket is a genetically engineered raccoon (but don't call him that) who's as handy with tech as he is with big guns. Voiced by Oscar-nominated actor Bradley Cooper, Rocket and his bodyguard/partner Groot are the breakout characters here. Groot, whose vocabulary consists of three words, "I am Groot" (voiced by Vin Diesel), is a huge tree creature of many different abilities. Both of them are lots of fun.

These characters go from hating each other to making a Great Escape break out to eventually saving the galaxy - I'm sure that's not a spoiler or surprise, but their bonding is at the core of the flick. Real plot details involve big bads everywhere, including James Brolin's Thanos, Benicio del Toro as The Collector, former "Doctor Who"companion Karen Gillan as Nebula, Michael Rooker of "The Walking Dead" as Yondu, and the wonderfully designed Ronan the Accuser as played by Lee Pace.

As far as cameos go there is of course Stan Lee, but also look for Glenn Close, John C. Reilly, Troma's Lloyd Kaufman, and the voices of Nathan Fillion, Rob Zombie, and in the after-credits sequence, Seth Green as Howard the Duck. Yeah, that's right, Howard the Duck. Perhaps this more character-correct (although it's only one line) version can help erase the George Lucas abomination from 1986, and of course now that Disney owns Marvel, Howard can go pantless. Also, as this movie proves that Rocket Raccoon can be done believably, maybe we can get a real Howard film in the future…

One of the best parts of Guardians of the Galaxy is the soundtrack, not the terrific score by Tyler Bates, but the songs featured throughout. Star-Lord has a cassette tape of 1970s hits that play throughout the film, and it is almost as important as the characters to the film, because the movie wouldn't be the same without it. The 1970s vibe rocks the movie and makes it special.

It is not all good however. We get precious little of Thanos, and the Collector's scenes are more than a bit disappointing (although we get to see a Celestial!), although I did dig that his home was inside the dead skull of a Celestial. I would have liked to have seen more use of Nebula, as would most "Doctor Who" fans coming to the flick. I am sure however we will see her again, as well as her father as I believe Thanos plays heavily in Avengers 3, and of course Guardians 2 is a go as well.

If wanting more is my only complaint, how bad could the flick really be? In fact, I think this is one of the best of the marvel movies, right up there with Iron Man, Captain America, and Avengers, and that's high praise indeed. If you want a bit more of my thoughts (and The Bride's), you can check out our special Guardians of the Galaxy episode of The Make Mine Magic Podcast.

RIP Gene Colan

We have lost another one of the great comics legends. Last night artist Gene Colan passed away, from complications of liver disease. He was 84.

His contributions to comics are numerous. Without Colan, Marvel Comics would be a less fascinating place. His unique style and groundbreaking work on amazing comics like Howard the Duck and The Tomb of Dracula, as well as Daredevil make him one of the legends of the industry. His interpretations of Iron Man, the Sub-Mariner, Batman, Captain America, Wonder Woman, and Night Force among others will not be forgotten. Gene Colan will be much missed.

Disney Acquires Marvel

The big news today both in business and entertainment is that Disney has purchased Marvel.

Folks in the know say that there will be no difference in the content of the types of entertainment Marvel produces. No mass firings, cancellations or anything else are currently on the horizon.

Apparently Marvel will continue to operate much the same way Pixar does in relation to Disney.

So does this mean Howard the Duck can finally take off his pants again?

Steve Gerber 1947-2008

Steve Gerber passed away yesterday. This is truly a sad sad time for the comics industry as one of its great innovators has died.

Gerber was probably best known for co-creating Howard the Duck, a character despite attempted butchery for the silver screen by George Lucas, was one of the most original concepts in decades. My first exposure to Howard was an issue of his series where an armored Howard became 'Iron Duck' and battled a seriously demented baddie named Dr. Bong who would club himself in his bell-shaped helmet with a bong-shaped to make loud headache-causing booms. Then I cam across Stephen King's "The Stand," where King described the reluctant hero as ridiculous and reason comics had gone to hell. It wasn't until later I realized what a brilliant, subtle and hilarious satire on our world Howard the Duck really was. Gerber was/is a genius.

Steve Gerber wrote many comics and characters over the years, including for Marvel Comics - Man-Thing, Omega the Unknown, Simon Garth the Zombie, Shanna the She-Devil, Son of Satan, Daredevil, Iron Man, She-Hulk, Hawkeye, the Guardians of the Galaxy and the rock band Kiss.

Far and above, for me at least, was his work on the Defenders, Marvel's premiere non-team. His run on that title was among the wildest, off-the-wall and coolest I've ever read in any comic. Gerber made the Defenders different, he made them demented, he made them cool. Among his concepts for the title were the additions of Luke Cage and the Red Guardian, the unbelievable Headmen, Korvac, Valkyrie's husband Jack Norris and the infamous Elf with a Gun. These were some of the most fun comics to read, ever.

Steve Gerber also did work for the independents with Destroyer Duck, Exiles and Stewart the Rat. His DC Comics work includes the amazing revival of Mister Miracle with late artist Marshall Rogers, and also work on Doctor Fate as a back-up in The Flash.

He also worked extensively in animation, winning an Emmy for his work on "The New Batman/Superman Adventures," and was also involved in other eries like "Dungeons & Dragons," "Transformers," "GI Joe" and "Thundarr the Barbarian."

Gerber recently returned to DC to work on the new Doctor Fate mini-series in Countdown to Mystery. It's probably one of the finest things on the shelves right now. He passed while in the process of writing this one. He will be missed. By me. By many. Rest in peace, man.

Man-Thing

"MOVIE THING"

A Television Review of the film "Man-Thing" broadcast on the SciFi Channel.

Copyright © 2005, Glenn Walker

The film version of Man-Thing supposedly was made and meant for theatrical release, as I've just viewed it on the SciFi Channel, I would guess those plans fell through. Granted, the Man-Thing is no Spider-Man, Hulk or X-Men, but that doesn't meant the concept couldn't hold its own on the big screen, or does it?

My sister, a big SciFi Channel fan, and I have discussed the schedule for that network on weekends quite a bit. Weekends seem to be a dumping ground for the absolute worst Z-grade scifi and horror films currently being made. Most notorious for flicks about giant snakes, alien abductions and guest starring Kari Wuhrer and Billy Baldwin, this death slot of bad television is where they aired Man-Thing - Saturday night at nine PM, prime time.

In the comics, Man-Thing is something of a footnote for various reasons. The concept is one of the true coincidences in the comics world, where two major publishers have had roughly the same idea at the exact same time. There was the Vision and the Red Tornado, Crisis on Infinite Earths and Secret Wars, and Man-Thing and Swamp Thing.
Both Man-Thing and Swamp Thing were men that were by horrible consequences transformed into bog creatures, and they both debuted on the stands simultaneously. Marvel's Man-Thing, created by Steve Gerber (also of Howard the Duck, another fantastic character crucified and disemboweled by Hollywood), had decidedly less success than DC's Swamp Thing however.

Man-Thing also had a great tagline - "Whatever knows fear burns at the touch of the Man-Thing!" If only the stories and the characters matched that line or even halfway lived up to the hype. While Man-Thing lasted, riding the wave of early 1970s Marvel horror, it did make a mark and remains a fixture and fan favorite in today's comics. Appearances with such other obtuse characters like the Hulk, Howard the Duck and the Micronauts were memorable.

The Man-Thing's most notorious claim to fame however might be the dangerous double entendre it gained in the mid-1970s with a companion title. At the time, Marvel was publishing larger books with bigger stories and added reprints of most of its books, called Giant-Sized books. You guessed it, thus was born Giant-Size Man-Thing, still legendary to this day. Despite what some folks may think, the book was still about a swamp creature and had nothing to do with what you're thinking. Shame on you!

From Lions Gate and Marvel Productions, we now have the movie. Despite being made for theatrical release and having a slamming soundtrack, the film does have the stink of a Saturday night SciFi Channel offering. Badly written, no name actors and a sad, pitiful premise where a reasonable, simpler one would have worked better.
The cinematic Man-Thing is an eco-champion, preying on evil industrialists who pollute and corrupt nature. He's (it's?) also a monster in the most fundamental manner. Shambling about, growling and staying in the dark for most of the time to hide any shabby special effects, he takes out The Man and helps out the bayou natives and Earth-friendly folk. Here Man-Thing is definitely more Bigfoot than Swamp Thing when you come right down to it.

When we do actually do see Man-Thing, the face is pretty close to the comics with the three roots hanging down and the piercing red eyes. However, the rest of the body is a whole other thing, or, pun intended, Man-Thing. Too skinny and too many wild, apparently sentient, and very Dr. Octopus-like roots to do its bidding are the highlights of this Man-Thing.

The story was slow and contrived, and especially cliched. Prophecy from 1979 did it much better. Nice touch though having a character named Ploog, named after artist Mike Ploog who depicted the swamp creature back in the 1970s, it proves the folks in charge at least had clue about the source material.

This could have been good. Director Brett Leonard has had quite a few misses, but when he hits (the highly underrated cyberpunk thriller Virtuosity and the absolutely brilliant Shock to the System) he hits hard. Shame he didn't put that kind of effort into Man-Thing. In related comics news however, the writer of this one, Hans Rodionoff is also rumored to be working on a script for another 1970s Marvel horror, Werewolf by Night.

An R-rated version of Man-Thing debuts in DVD on June 14th. Now maybe if they make a sequel, and Sci-Fi is notorious for making sequels to movies that by every right under the sun shouldn't be made, maybe they'll call it Giant-Size Man-Thing.