The Legend of Tarzan

The Legend of Tarzan ~ Don't tell him this, I don't want him to get a swollen head, but my big brother rocks. Even before he saved my life by giving me one of his kidneys, I always looked up to him. As his ten years junior little brother, I wanted to be like him, and what he thought was cool, I wanted to think was cool too. I've mentioned numerous times in my writing that my love of the Flash comes from him, and a recent interview with Joe DeVito reminded me of how I watched King Kong because of the big bro too. And then there's Tarzan.

My big brother also made me watch Tarzan by his enthusiasm for it. I remember very distinctly being sat down on a Saturday afternoon to watch 'the one where Tarzan goes to New York to save Boy.' The film in question was Tarzan's New York Adventure with Johnny Weissmuller and Maureen O'Sullivan, and for me, it was awesome. A new world had been opened up to me. From there I discovered Tarzan books and Tarzan comics (both of which were the best), the TV series with Ron Ely, and whenever one of the Weissmuller flicks showed, I was right there in front of the boob tube.

I loved the movies, and the TV show was okay, but I really grooved on the real Tarzan, the one from the books, and to some extent the comics. I knew he was a lot smarter than Weissmuller in the movies, a noble savage, a clever warrior, and an intelligent opponent. And I loved all the lost cities and fantasy elements, which led to my appreciation of Edgar Rice Burroughs' other awesomeness like Pellucidar and John Carter of Mars.

Because of this knowledge of what Tarzan was all about from the books, that he wasn't all yells and "me Tarzan, you Jane," I had rarely been truly happy with many cinematic versions. Casper Van Dien came close in Tarzan and the Lost City, but of course, no matter how you measure it, it's still a Casper Van Dien movie. I wondered if we'd ever get a Tarzan movie again, let alone a good one, and then came The Legend of Tarzan.

I had only heard whispers about it while it was being made, but had heard it was quite good. When I first saw the trailer, I was excited, and then I saw who was playing Tarzan, and my heart fell. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against Alexander Skarsgard, in fact, I'm a fan. His Eric Northman in "True Blood" was consistently one of the best things about the series, even when it was at its worst.

My great fear was that every time I looked at his Tarzan, I would see Eric. This is one of the reasons why studios usually look for unknowns when casting serial protagonists. I shouldn’t have worried though, from the moment we see Skarsgard on the screen, from the moment I saw him, I saw Tarzan. He is stunning in the role. Alexander Skarsgard is Tarzan. A man of few words, much action, and a caring hero, Skarsgard brings the king of the jungle to life in a way we've not seen in quite some time.

As Jane, and in previous films, Margot Robbie continues to impress me as an actress. Her Jane Porter Clayton is tough, takes no nonsense, and is yet still believable as a turn of the century woman of stature. Christoph Waltz overacts like a madman as the baddie, and it works, much better than his attempt at villainy in the James Bond franchise. He has shown that he can be evil in both a subtle and a manic mode. Samuel L. Jackson brings the humor and his contrast to Tarzan is one of the better aspects of the flick. I wish he'd been more however.

I'm not going to harp on or bring up the racism of the Tarzan stories (in that only a white man save Africa, etc.), there are much better men than me that can handle that, but I will note that the story of the movie takes place in a very dangerous era of the Congo, a time of massacre and genocide, and I wish the character would have stayed in the fantasy realm. Furthermore, I have to express distaste in the choice of Jackson's role, especially if he was going to be used for comic relief.

Samuel l. Jackson plays George Washington Williams, a real historical figure. He was a human rights activist who very specifically attacked King Leopold for his actions in the Congo. In my mind, especially played by an actor of Samuel L. Jackson's skills, I wish they'd gone with a more accurate portrayal of the man, rather than just comic relief/sidekick status.

That aside, I really loved this flick, and was grinning ear to ear throughout most of it. I can't wait for sequels. I enjoyed this almost as much as Captain America: Civil War, recommended.

Daredevil S01 E13: Daredevil

We open this final episode of the first season of "Marvel's Daredevil" with the funeral of Ben Urich. His death last episode makes the bloody credits sequence all the more poignant. This was a shocking death as Ben is still alive and well in the comics. And if you don't cry when Karen meets Ben's wife, I just can't help you.

Later in this finale written and directed by Steven S. DeKnight, Fisk confronts Owlsley over recent events. He knows he was behind the poisoning. The Owl thinks he has leverage but Kingpin doesn't care, and throws him down an elevator shaft. I guess I was right about Owlsley's son quite possibly being the real Owl. And Fisk, wow, between Urich, Owlsley, and Vanessa, he's got quite a mommy complex.

On the positive side, it's good to see Charlie Cox and Elden Henson bringing that great chemistry they have back to Nelson and Murdock, and Deborah Ann Woll's Karen just completes that triangle. This works, I wish it didn't have to break before it works again. With most of the cops on the take, the FBI is brought into the equation, and in that way, the good guys win the way Matt wanted it - through the law. Even Senator Cherryh is brought in. Only Fisk remains, and thirty minutes in, they have him too.

It's nice that the good guys win, but where is the superhero action, and especially the kind of action that has highlighted this series from the beginning? DeKnight knows this kind of action even when he doesn't show it. One of the more intense fight scenes is shown only in the subtle reactions on the blood-spattered face of actor Daryl Edwards as crooked cop Hoffman. We see nothing, but we feel everything.

After Wilson Fisk, in custody, on his way to confinement, tells his two guards the story of The Good Samaritan, all hell breaks loose. Vincent D'Onofrio, channeling Samuel L. Jackson from Pulp Fiction, speculates on which character from the tale he is. He used to think he was The Good Samaritan, but now he feels he is the ill intent that befell the man. That's when the NYPD ambushes the FBI... and we find that the Kingpin owns people everywhere.

With a showdown approaching and armed men in the streets, Matt goes to retrieve his body armor finally from Melvin Potter. In payment, he promised to keep Melvin's Betsy safe from Fisk. I've a feeling this might not be a promise Matt can keep and we'll be seeing Gladiator in the future especially after getting a glimpse circular saw blueprints. Either way, finally, it's our hero as he's most recognizable.

I don't like the costume. After seeing the lycra outfit that is so flexible and easily movable in, this plated body armor looks bulky, fake, and distracting. I had trouble believing he could move well in it. I don't believe leather and metal can bend like that. And I would have liked some explanation of the billy club, what it does… and how he got so good with it. I know I'm the guy who always wants the superhero trappings, but here, after a dozen episodes in simpler more believable garb, I just don't buy it. I should like it, but I don't.

Fisk has an escape plan, and a countdown to a meetup with Vanessa where they'll leave the city together. I don't think Daredevil will let him get away that easily. The combat is intense, but I have to say I was distracted by the costume for much of it. Besides Fisk, there are happy endings all around yet no explanations of how the police force was cleaned up, if it was, or any of that mess. I guess we'll have to wait for season two, and perhaps Fisk's trial.

At this point all we really know about season two is that there is one, sometime in 2016, and that Elodie Yung will be playing Elektra, and Jon Bernthal, formerly of "The Walking Dead," will be playing the Punisher. As someone likes the Punisher even less than Daredevil, I don't care much about that last one. There have been rumors of Bullseye too, but I already saw that in the Ben Affleck film. Personally, if I get Gladiator and the Stilt-Man, as teased in this series, I'll be happy.

If the rest of these Netflix series are as good as "Daredevil," I will be very happy. I really really dug this. Highly recommended.

Marvel's The Avengers - Three Years Later

I reviewed Marvel's The Avengers right after I saw it, three years ago, and although I have seen it numerous times since then, I thought it might be fun to take a new look at it on the eve of Avengers: Age of Ultron.

The movies have many franchises, among the biggest and longest are James Bond and Godzilla, but neither really depends on any kind of serious internal continuity or connection to each other. To an extent, the Universal horrors worked the same. Each film represents its own story and doesn't really need the others to be seen. Star Wars and later Star Trek play it differently as you do need to see the others, as it's more of a longform movie serial.

No one really tried to do an internal continuity on this scale until the Marvel Cinematic Universe. All of their 'phase one' led up to this moment - Marvel's The Avengers. This is House of Frankenstein as an endgame. We can't wait to see our heroes, and then we can't wait to see them together. Everyone is given room to move, time to shine, and still we are wanting more. From Iron Man's AC/DC entrance to Black Widow turning the tables on a brutal interrogation to Captain America going hand to hand with Loki - everyone gets a chance to shine solo until it's time to work together.

Then there's the reality of what we're really seeing. This is a S.H.I.E.L.D. movie, this is the S.H.I.E.L.D. movie. Had the series been like this, it would have been a surefire hit. Witness the majestic Star Trek-like launch of the Helicarrier, the huge bridge, the glee and command that Coulson has in the flick, all of this should have been the basis for the "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D." TV show, rather than what we got.

This is the S.H.I.E.L.D. show we wanted. Did they dismantle the Helicarrier set as soon as filming was done? They could have used that. Maybe Samuel L. Jackson or Cobie Smulders could have recorded more footage for the show, but from other locations rather than going to the series set. And would we have really minded recycled footage from this movie in the show? I think not.

There is joy in the chemistry of the characters, and the actors. Without the shadow of Civil War over them, Captain America and Iron Man are friends and partners, Hawkeye and the Black Widow share moments, and Mark Ruffalo subtly steals the show as the buffer between all parties, even his CGI counterpart does his share of scene stealing. Loki is delicious, Fury is perfect, and the movie remains the best comic book superhero movie ever…

…at least until I see Avengers: Age of Ultron later tonight…

The Avengers

Marvel's The Avengers ~ I think I need to inform folks where I'm coming from on this one. One could say I've been waiting for this movie for over forty years easily. I learned to read on comic books, thanks to my cool big sister. First there was Batman, obviously influenced by the 1960s TV show, then I started reading my brother's Flash and Justice League. I was solidly a DC Comics guy as you can see, and then I discovered the Avengers. It would be quite some time before I became a regular Marvel reader but I knew instantly this was a different kind of comic. Avengers became one of my favorite comics, even today. So much so did I love the Avengers that for almost a decade I regularly reviewed the title online. Yeah, I'm a hardcore Avenger-phile. This movie is a little kid's dream come true.

In another sense, you could say I've been waiting for this movie realistically, and hopefully, since the end credits of Iron Man. Can I express my elation the first time I saw those few seconds when Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury wanted to talk to Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark/Iron Man about the 'Avengers Initiative'? No, I can't. I am as speechless now as I was in 2008.

Who would have thought Marvel Comics/Marvel Studios could have pulled this off? Not only have they created a cinematic continuity, a movie universe as tight and intriguing as their comics universe, they also changed the way we watch movies. Does anyone (at least anyone who knows) not stay until the final credits any more. This is something that John Hughes used to do for a gag. It's something the James Bond films used to do to reveal the title of the next installment. Marvel has made it a genre-wide trick of the trade. You stay until the screen has no more light, period.

Speaking of James Bond, the other achievement Marvel has taken on is the building of a successful movie franchise - the Marvel Cinematic Universe, of which The Avengers is the seventh, or the sixth, depending on whether you count Ang Lee's Hulk or not. I think all of this would have been impossible without Iron Man, and especially Robert Downey Jr. Downey is the secret weapon, the gateway drug, if you will. Without Downey, I doubt that this film would be as mainstream as it is. It's not just comic book folks who are seeing this movie, it's everybody. Comics aren't just for nerds anymore, or at least comic book movies aren't. This weekend's box office, threatening to become the biggest opening ever, is proof of that.

Besides Downey as Iron Man, and Jackson as super spy Nick Fury, Chris Evans returns as the title role from Captain America The First Avenger, Chris Hemsworth as Thor, along with Oscar winner Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye from that same film, and Scarlet Johansson returns in her role as the Black Widow from Iron Man 2. Unfortunately, negotiations broke down with The Incredible Hulk's Ed Norton, so the role of Doctor Bruce Banner is more than adequately filled by Mark Ruffalo. As much as I like and liked Norton in the role, I like Ruffalo even more. This is a good thing.

Also returning from the previous Marvel Cinematic Universe flicks are Clark Gregg as Agent Coulson, Stellan Skarsgard as Erik Selvig from Thor, Gwenyth Paltrow as Pepper Potts and Paul Bettany as Jarvis in the Iron Man films, and of course the big bad, Thor's brother Loki, as played by Tom Hiddleston. Natalie Portman's Jane Foster from Thor is mentioned but unseen. Cobie Smoulders is the perfect Maria Hill and although uncredited and only doing one very funny and wonderful line of dialogue, Lou Ferrigno voices the completely CGI Hulk. It is a stellar cast, top notch all the way, and all of the primaries - the Avengers, Fury, Loki, and the rest shine like stars when on screen. All are skillfully performed.

If I had to find fault, if I absolutely had to find a flaw in the film (other than characters or storylines I would want to see) it would be the lack of character development. But even that's not a flaw. The four majors have had at least one movie each to explore that before we got to this point. We get sweet spotlights on the two Avengers without movies, Hawkeye and the Black Widow, displaying their talents and personalities, and Nick Fury will have his own film upcoming for us to delve more into his character. So really, on that point I can't complain. What is really great about this is all of them come to this film fully formed. Especially in the cases of Captain America and Thor, their movies were essentially origin stories, now, here in Avengers we get to see what they can really do. These are not flaws.

I will try not to give away plot points, or any of the Easter eggs found in the film, but I will give director and co-writer Joss Whedon and his co-writer Zak Penn all the props possible for creating what is, without a doubt, the best superhero movie ever made, period. Let's see Whedon have a Wonder Woman script or a "Firefly" sequel turned down in Hollywood now. The man, to borrow the line from Titanic, is the king of the world today. Everything was perfect, from the characters to the dialogue, the special effects, the humor, right down to the two (count 'em, two) after-credits scenes, one of which will be having fanboys and girls squeeing with delight. Marvel's The Avengers is awesome.

The little kid in me who was mesmerized by his first Avengers comic book more than forty years ago was spellbound in the theatre. From Project Pegasus to the Black Forest to the SHIELD Helicarrier to downtown Manhattan, the Avengers were truly Earth's Mightiest Heroes on the big screen. The first confrontations between the heroes, and the heroes and the villains, are well done and believable, not just slugfest for the fun of slugfest. When Captain America confronts Loki in Germany, I had a lump in my throat, I was like, "It's the real Captain America." The scene is that good.

The special effects are stunning. I love the way Thor's hammer always returns to him, and his effects are perfect. Cap's superhero costume, which I initially thought would look silly works wonderfully. If there's anything cooler than the SHIELD Helicarrier, it's the battle on board the SHIELD Helicarrier. Non-believers will see why Hawkeye is one of the coolest Avengers. The interaction between the characters is priceless, and in the final battle, their teamwork whether all together or in smaller teams is right out of the comics. It's beautiful.

I will probably see Marvel's The Avengers again a few more times in the theatre before it comes to Blu-Ray and DVD. Yeah, it's that good. The 3D effects are good, but let's keep in mind it still looks amazing in 2D, so you don't have to sell blood to see it. Highly recommended. A definite must see for comics and non-comics fans alike. This is the movie of 2012.

Winnie the Pooh 2011

Winnie the Pooh ~ I saw this one not in the theaters, but as an added treat on the first night of my vacation onboard the Disney Dream, and let's get real, nothing trumps seeing a Disney flick, like seeing a Disney flick on the Disney boat. They have built, on all their ships, beautiful old-fashioned movie theaters full of the glory of yesteryear where there are no bad seats and it feels like an event to see any film. Last year, seeing Old Dogs on board made the hell of that cinematic experience wonderful. Loews in Cherry Hill should take note. Atmosphere counts for a lot.

Unlike Old Dogs, I liked Winnie the Pooh quite a lot, mostly because Tigger is my favorite Disney character, I even liked The Tigger Movie, and that was pretty bad, although it was Gone with the Wind compared to Old Dogs. I love A.A. Milne's characters, by Disney or otherwise, but have not been fond of newer versions of their adventures. This new animated film is respectful of the original The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh and is a proper next chapter.

There is a mix of both old and new voice cast, with Jim Cummings taking on both Tigger and Pooh as well as a few other additions like Craig Ferguson and John Cleese. Only one oddity sticks out and that's Jack Boulter as Christopher Robin, and that's only because it's markedly different, not wrong. And also, just like a Marvel movie, you must wait through the credits to the very end. No, Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury doesn't ask Tigger to join the Avengers (awww...) but it's still well worth it.

Quickies 1-8-2011

Me and Orson Welles ~ This is essentially about Orson Welles and the Mercury Theater's production of Julius Caesar in 1937. An aggressive young high school kid and wannabe actor gets hired into the play and unfortunately involved in a romance with an older woman on set. Much like Orson Welles' personality in real life, his character, so much larger than life, also takes over this kid's story. Great stuff.

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time ~ For a movie based on a limited graphics videogame from the early 1980s, this flick has a good premise, lots of potential, but little was aspired to. Some nice special effects, some interesting plot twists and frequent nice nods to the old Sinbad movies of the 1960s and 1970s, this is worth a watch if it's on television. Good popcorn flick.

Whip It ~ Drew Barrymore's direction of this film based on the book "Derby Girl" by Shauna Cross is very good. Great drama, great comedy, and all with a heart as well. It has the feel of a contemporary After School Special, and that's a good thing. One of my favorite flicks of the year.

Formula 51 ~ This is mindless shoot-'em-up fun that is carried chiefly by the charisma of Samuel L. Jackson as chemist Elmo McElroy who has created a superdrug. Robert Carlyle from The Full Monty is also fun here as the Jackie Chan to Sam's more talented Chris Tucker. Turn your mind off, put your feet up and enjoy an hour and a half of action thriller fun.

Iron Man 2

Iron Man 2 ~ I’ve been waiting for this for a while now, and it finally opened, a bit late for the previews to have become annoying, and of course even more annoyingly, a week after it opened in the UK and Australia. I really have to wonder why the movie companies insist on staggered releases across the world when the internet exists. Don’t they know the flick has already been spoiled for American audiences?

Iron Man 2 picks up almost immediately as the first film ends, but not in the way one might think. From there it becomes a rollercoaster ride of subplots as if it doesn’t know what its real storyline is.

Of seeming highest priority of possible plots is Mickey Roarke’s Ivan Vanko who wants revenge on Robert Downey Jr.’s Tony Stark for supposedly stealing his father’s design. There’s Tony’s new heart poisoning him just as he’s drinking himself to death and risking his life. There’s Gwyneth Paltrow’s Pepper Potts (still the dumbest comic book name ever) trying to run Stark’s company and of course her non-romance with him that doesn’t exist in the comics. And the government, in the face of the strangely cast Garry Shandling, wants the Iron Man ‘weapon.’ Those are just the big ones.

Any one of these could have been the main story, and served it well on its own, but for some reason the script couldn’t make up its mind. Underneath the surface of this Iron Man is bubbling an Avengers prequel, and for those aware of what Avengers is, it is a major undercurrent of this film, perhaps moreso than anything to actually do with Iron Man.

Rumors from overseas seem to be right on this front, that this is more an Avengers movie than an Iron Man movie. Easter eggs abound everywhere, from Captain America’s shield to Thor’s hammer, to the outright appearances out of nowhere of Samuel L. Jackson’s ultra-cool Nick Fury to Scarlet Johansson’s ultra-hot Black Widow (although it’s notable her superheroine name is never mentioned). It makes you wonder why Marvel would risk the Iron Man sequel for a movie that’s not even written yet.

And there are still yet more subplots. They tried to squeeze Tony Stark’s problem with alcoholism in there. Don Cheadle, a great actor, but a poor substitute for Terrence Howard, puts on the War Machine armor. Sam Rockwell does an impressive Robert Downey Jr. impersonation, that I’m not sure is in homage or mocking his Stark, as a decisively younger Justin Hammer.

The big guns of this script are largely disappointments. Downey is simply over the top, as if he doesn’t care anymore. Paltrow struggles as if she doesn’t know what to do with herself on screen. Mickey Roarke is damn good and owns the film when he is onscreen, he’s just not there nearly enough. His character, a merging of two Iron Man foes from the comics, Whiplash and the Crimson Dynamo, had enough depth to carry the whole film – but the script would not let it happen.

I did enjoy the film, but that was as a hardcore comics fan. I think it might be too jumpy and frenetic for mainstream audiences, who will also be giving all those Avengers references blank stares. And speaking of Avengers – stay through the end of the credits, or you will regret it. Iron Man 2 is fun and action-packed, but it’s nowhere as good as the original.

Inglourious Basterds

Inglourious Basterds ~ This may be just another bloody Quentin Tarantino flick or it may be his homage to World War II films and Spaghetti Westerns, but what it definitely is is a love letter from a movie lover to other movie lovers. Then again, most Tarantino films are that, but this is for real film lovers, not just grindhouse or martial arts movie lovers.

The cinematography, the scenery, the dialogue, the choreography, even and especially the music, touches the true movie lover in a way that the casual moviegoer just won’t appreciate. Everything is referential, from the character names, to the songs, to the conversations and set pieces. This is a brilliant film, if only for film buffs.

Regarding the spelling in the title, I think it’s just for copyright and trademark reasons. Perhaps it’s to differentiate it from the 1978 Italian film with Bo Svenson and Fred Williamson called Inglorious Bastards. Just for the record, this isn’t a remake or anything of the sort. The only thing these two flicks have in common, other than a similar title, is that they both take place behind enemy lines in WWII. Of the spelling, Tarantino says, "Here's the thing. I'm never going to explain that. You do an artistic flourish like that, and to explain it would just take the piss out of it and invalidate the whole stroke in the first place."

The plot, simple but presented in a complex way (this is a Tarantino film after all), revolves around the Basterds – Jewish-American soldiers killing Nazis in occupied France – blowing up a moviehouse in Paris where the Nazi High Command will be gathered for a very special movie premiere. And just for the record, don’t bring the kids. When I say killing I mean Tarantino-style killing. Not pretty.

Brad Pitt impressed me here and he doesn’t do that often. His southern accent and charm as Aldo Raine was haunting, almost as if he was channeling Andy Griffith in A Face in the Crowd. He’s just as charming and sociopathic as well. There’s just not enough of him in the film. Unfortunately Eli Roth channeling the Bowery Boys is as painful as Pitt is brilliant.

Other than Brad Pitt, the standout of the cast is Christoph Waltz as the villain Hans Landa. Both charismatic and chilling, he makes the most convincing and evil Nazi to make the screen since Ralph Fiennes’ Amon Goeth in Schindler’s List. He is a perfect villain. And Samuel L. Jackson’s brief narration was a fun surprise.

As many good things as I have to say about Inglourious Basterds, it’s not all good. Tarantino seems to be recycling jokes at some points, especially with the Little Man name bit that recalls Mr. Pink in Reservoir Dogs. His foot fetish also rears its ugly head but not as blatantly in previous films.

The inclusion of David Bowie’s “Cat People” (the film version) in a WWII movie seems intrusive, and perhaps not right any longer considering Quentin couldn’t get Nastassja Kinski for the role it references as he intended. Also Mike Myers’ cameo is bizarre. I really expected him to pull off his make-up and wig at any moment and yell, “Surprise! It’s me!”

Shosanna’s (played expertly by Melanie Laurent) story is much more compelling than that of the Basterds. It made me wonder if perhaps there should have been two different films here. There are certainly two different themes. If there were indeed problems with the length of the movie, as the rumors claim, maybe it should have been two films, much like Kill Bill.

All that said, I would definitely recommend Inglourious Basterds with the proviso that it’s a Qunetin Tarantino flick, so know what you’re going to see before you go. But do go.

Quickies 4-3-2009

Prozac Nation ~ I’ve decided that Christina Ricci is best when she’s snarky and sarcastic. From The Addams Family to The Opposite of Sex to even Pumpkin, her best feature (although there are so many others) is her snarkiness. This film, sort of a Mommie Dearest meets Almost Famous based on the true story bestseller by Elizabeth Wurtzel (who incidentally thought this movie was horrible), is a bit depressing and you want to slap the heroine (more than once), but hang in there. The performances of Ricci, Jessica Lange and even Jason Biggs are worth it.

Tokyo Gore Police ~ This one is for fans of the gore genre only, and only in small doses. I give the trailer more stars than I would the movie – if any for the movie. Dazzlingly gory and imaginative special effects. Don’t eat before viewing. If you like Troma or J-horror, you’ll love this one.

Lakeview Terrace ~ Take Neighbors, mix well with Pacific Heights and add in Samuel L. Jackson and you’ll get this flick that never tries much harder than to be a 1970s ABC telemovie. Kim Darby would have been proud to have been in this back in the day. Entertaining if you’re not expecting to think much for a couple hours.

Zotz! ~ Bullet time decades before bullet time, and Disney-esque without being Disney, this black and white comedy from 1962 stars Tom Poston as a professor who finds an ancient magic coin that grants him super powers. Able to slow down time and point people into pain, he tries to sell his powers to the government and hilarity ensues. While it would greatly benefit from some idiotic canned 1970s sitcom laughter, it’s still great fun for the kids.

At the Earth’s Core ~ Sadly the only film adaptation of Edgar Rice Burroughs’ Pellucidar series is just an embarrassment. Doug McClure tries very hard despite more than half of his dialogue being the word “doc,” and of course Peter Cushing hands in his worst and most annoying performance ever. On the good side, Caroline Munro is as hot as ever, but she doesn’t have much to do here. Much of the magic of Pellucidar is missing, the ‘monsters’ look like rejects from the worst of the Gamera films and surely Burroughs is spinning in his grave. A travesty.

Nick Fury Is Back

For all the hardcore comic book fans and those movie viewers who stayed past the credits of last summer's Marvel Comics superhero blockbuster Iron Man, Samuel L. Jackson stole the show with his minute and half as SHIELD Director Nick Fury. It was a dream role for Jackson as the Ultimate version of the character was in fact designed after his own image.

Fans panicked a month or so back when rumors indicated that Jackson would not be returning to this role, especially with the character's integral status regarding current and future Marvel movie characters like Iron Man, the Hulk, Captain America and especially the Avengers, the last one being the subject of the above-mentioned film appearance of Fury.

The good news is that Variety reported yesterday that Jackson will officially be playing the Marvel Comics super spy in a total of nine films, including Iron Man 2 and The Avengers. Of course the inclusion of something called "The Shield" among those films seems to indicate that either the folks at Variety have a hearing problem or they're using TV Guide's research people...

Frank Miller’s The Spirit

That’s right, this is Frank Miller’s The Spirit, not Will Eisner’s, that’s for damn sure. Frank Miller hates superheroes. I’ve said it before, and I’m pretty sure I’ll say it again. Frank Miller hates superheroes. If The Dark Knight Strikes Back is Exhibit A, then surely this film, 2008’s The Spirit is Exhibit B. I have read and heard that Eisner and Miller were great friends. I can only suppose that they fought before the former’s death because I think this interpretation of his hallmark character may well have him spinning in his grave. Frank Miller’s The Spirit is a hate mail for not just comic book fans but movie goers as well.

Was the Sin City sequel not ready for a Christmas release so the studio grabbed Frank Miller and forced him to rush this piece of crap into theatres? That’s my only guess, because it certainly looks more like Sin City than any possible version of the Spirit. Again I am pulled back to the Miller/Eisner friendship. What did they talk about? Surely not the Spirit because obviously Miller doesn’t have a clue what that’s about.

For those not in the know. The Spirit is an amazing comics character created by Will Eisner specifically for the newspapers, a stroke of brilliance at the time as it wasn’t a newspaper comic strip, but a weekly comic book insert that came in the Sunday paper. The Spirit stories were known for their imaginative and innovative graphic design and storytelling structure – decades ahead of anything that was going on in ‘real’ comic books of the time. Eisner was truly a genius ahead of his time, and one of the masters of the artform.

The character of the Spirit himself was ex-cop Denny Colt. Exposed to a weird chemical he appeared to be dead but was really in suspended animation when buried and written off as dead. Crawling out of the grave, donning a mask and using his now officially dead status as a cover, he became the Spirit and defended the people of Central City from all manner of villain, many of them female, and frequently rivaling the rogues galleries of Batman and Dick Tracy in their strangeness.

How Frank Miller took that and got this movie is something I will never understand. It reminds of “Smallville” in one way – some of the names are familiar but nothing else is. Frank Miller’s Spirit is super-powered where the original never was. He shares an origin with archenemy the Octopus in that a chemical exposure left them both with ridiculous Wolverine-like regenerative powers. They can’t die, and so engage in cartoon-like combat with anvils and infinite bullet holes. I think even Tex Avery would think these scenes overindulgent.

These aren’t the only differences. Most annoying that Miller’s Spirit is all in black, except for the red tie. The Spirit really doesn’t have a costume for heaven sakes, so why is it so hard to get it right? In the comics, simplicity itself, blue business suit, blue hat, blue gloves, blue mask, and red tie. Well, at least he got the tie right. This is a CGI motion capture film, you can’t tell me that blue wouldn’t work, or for that matter, look terrific. Is it really that hard? Comic book superheroes come in colors, for some reason Hollywood mutants forget that. Miller, having worked in the industry, should know better. But then again, it’s probably on purpose, he does hate superheroes, remember?

The casting is interesting. I liked Gabriel Macht in the title role, a lot. It’s a shame he couldn’t be the real Spirit because he would be terrific. Too bad Frank Miller has made it so no one will ever want to make another Spirit movie ever again, so bad the stigma will be from this. Dolan is miscast, and the women are all breathtakingly beautiful, if only on hand most of the time as sex objects. This is Frank Miller after all. Are we sure this isn’t the Sin City sequel? I know he hates superheroes, but I wonder what his problem with women is as well. Maybe he hates everything as everything gets the short end of the stick in this flick. Including Miller’s own cameo –P.U.

Louis Lombardi provides a bit of odd comic relief. Funny only if you are into S&M or the Three Stooges I suppose. He plays multiple clones who are henchmen to the Octopus, killed and mistreated left and right, and assures that Lombardi will never get a serious role again, much less any part of any “Sopranos” or “24” reunions. The clone names, printed on the fronts of their shirts, provide a bit of an inappropriate injoke that can distract from how bad this flick is.

Samuel L. Jackson as the Octopus is a curiosity when you consider, that in the comic book version, you never see the Octopus, never. It’s the trademark of the character. The question is not why was this done, but - can Samuel L. survive this? Can his career recover from this offensive cartoon of a movie? Over the top doesn’t cover the madness of his performance. I’m sure many directors will unfortunately think of his role as the Octopus when considering him for work and just take a pass. I love Sam, but he stepped in it this time.

Frank Miller hates superheroes, and he must really really hate the Spirit. Maybe he saw what a success The Dark Knight was and decided he had to kill this beast before it got too big, too popular. He had to drag comics back into the literary gutter where he thinks they belong. Well, Frank, after seeing your interpretation of the Spirit, all I can say, is “Good job.”

Shark Attack

Shark Attack ~ Seeking to cash in on the theatrical release of the clever horror flick Deep Blue Sea and the always bankable shark phenomenon, this 1999 made-for-TV rip-off doesn’t really have much going for it. Casper Van Dien is always at his best playing the same character he always plays, and the sharks are good, even when they don’t match the footage of the humans they are supposedly attacking. It’s a blatant steal from a much better movie. The only thing worth watching here is another brilliant performance from one of Hollywood’s most underrated character actors, Ernie Hudson. When are he and Samuel L. Jackson gonna make a movie together?