Saturday, September 11, 2004

"CAN YOU BELIEVE THE HYPE?"

"CAN YOU BELIEVE THE HYPE?"

A Video Review of "Swimfan"

Copyright 2004 Glenn Walker

I saw a lot of movies in theatres in the summer of 2002. By far, the most hyped movie of that summer was Swimfan. You couldn’t blink without tripping over this preview or being smacked in the face with the poster. I grew to hate the previews, previously one of my favorite parts of going to the movies. The hype definitely lasted much much longer than the film itself was even in the theatres.

Swimfan was directed by second-rate actor John Polson and written by a pair of first timers, Charles Bohl and Phillip Schneider. Despite the strikes against them, it’s not that bad. I do wonder whose idea the ever-present blue tint in this flick was - that person deserves serious anti-props.

The story itself is child’s play to anyone who’s seen a Lifetime thriller or an early 1970s ABC movie of the week. Poor schmuck doesn’t return psycho chick’s affections and she stalks him with gimmicks and shocks that would make Alfred Hitchcock and William Castle blush.

The ‘victimized’ guy is Jesse Bradford, from Hackers who was also one of the underrated highlights of Bring It On. I put victimized in quotes because technically he brought all this on himself by being sexually promiscuous with a sociopath. It’s sort of a twist on the old slasher film theory that if you do it you die.

Taking on the Glenn Close Fatal Attraction role is Julia Stiles-wannabe Erika Christensen who was also in The Banger Sisters and the Leave It to Beaver movie. They do their best. Whether that’s a compliment or not remains to be seen.

Blink and you’ll miss relatively decent actors Dan Hedeya and Nick Sandow as obligatory adults, the coach and cop respectively. Also look out for Jason Ritter, son of the late John Ritter and star of "Joan of Arcadia" who does a good turn here.

What’s really annoying about the whole scenario is the "Pretty White Kids with Problems" vibe flowing through the whole movie. It’s hard for me to relate to happy, well-adjusted teenagers who have their own cars in high school, getting scholarships and having serious relationships - all at seventeen - even if they are being stalked by sociopathic girlfriends. Maybe it’s just me.

In retrospect, after finally seeing this film almost two years later, the previews were much much better than the film itself. I would have rather seen the preview.


Thursday, July 22, 2004

Pretty/Scary

Press Release: July 2004
Pretty/Scary: Women in Horror
http://www.pretty-scary.com

Women in Horror: Why?

Pretty/Scary. The duality of the phrase is simple. Women can be pretty. They can also be scary. Women can be pretty scary. In a world where most geeks are men, it’s hard for women to find one another among all the testosterone-ridden conventions, film screenings, comic book stores, and underground video collections. It’s also difficult to find a way for women to accept their beauty, sex appeal, and femininity while acknowledging that they are smart, talented, and intelligent as well. When you think of a geek, does Angelina Jolie pop into your head? Well, not really. But if you think about some of the films she’s been in (Tomb Raider, anyone?) it’s clear to see that she’s got a geeky side to herself. For years women have been presented as only the objects of men’s affections, gracing the covers of Draculina Magazine and appearing nearly naked in slasher films, with never a thought from anyone that maybe women are doing it cause they like horror and science fiction. Maybe they don’t only exist to please men, but to please themselves. Maybe there are pretty geeks, after all!

When I started getting to know women in the horror business, I soon found out that many driving forces were women. There are actresses who seduce, but also produce. There are horror writers, actresses, and artists out there who are just as active, if not more so, than men, who don’t get a chance to exploit their femininity. It’s the twenty-first century, and it’s about time that women can be pretty and scary without having to compromise either their beauty or their intelligence in order to be part of the horror world.

Amy Lynn Best, Jennifer Whildin, and I (Heidi Martinuzzi) started Pretty/Scary so that women in horror have a place to promote their films and novels, to congregate, to read about other women, to network, and to read about horror from the point of view of other women. Not to sound like a feminist (and I’m not knocking feminism), but most horror magazines and websites are all about men. Women are treated only as eye candy only. At Pretty/Scary, we treat men like Eye candy. Every month we will list a new Hot Man in Horror, and we’ll turn him into a piece of meat for all to see. Our first HOT man is Eli Roth, director of Cabin Fever and his interview is about 5 lines long. He’s lucky we gave him that before we started drooling. We will also honor actresses, writers, and producers for their contributions to the horror industry. Our first honoree is Cassandra Peterson, AKA Elvira, who graces us with a three page interview and her view on women in horror.

Aside from interviews and news, Pretty/Scary hopes to be the definitive review site for horror films and novels by women. Giving an in-depth look at all novels and films written, produced, or directed by women, Pretty/Scary will also review books and films where women are the main characters (like I Spit on Your Grave, Catwoman, and The Grudge). There is a mailing list and a forum, plus an area where members can post their own horror fiction. We have original dark and horror themed artwork by women in our art galleries, and we will be covering and reviewing women in punk, gothic, and hardcore metal bands. We’re trying to cover all aspects of horror, so if we’ve left anything out, please let us know! We want to cover independent and mainstream horror alike; there’ s no room for distinction when our main focus is on women.

The website will be launched July 30th, 2004 and can be found at www.pretty-scary.com. We welcome anyone in the horror business, female and male, to come visit and contribute in any way. Likewise, we are always looking for news stories and women to promote.

Pretty/Scary, in conjunction with Necroscopic Entertainment, is launching a 2005 Women in Independent Horror Calendar that will be available for purchase on the Pretty/Scary website and in comic book stores and book stores around the country this Fall. The calendar features horror actresses Sheri Moon Zombie, Brinke Stevens, Debbie Rochon, Ryli Morgan, Melantha Blackthorne, Suzi Lorraine, Amy Lynn Best, Syn DeVil, Lilith Stabs, April Burril, Rachael Robbins, and me, Heidi! (even though I am not a Scream Queen) One of the main issues I have found with Women in Horror is the strange distinction that some horror actresses have developed, that of Scream Queen. I thought it was an interesting topic to ask the girls about, since not only are they Scream Queens, but they are being put in a Calendar for that very reason. Here is what some of the most important women in horror films today have to say about the ideas of women, horror, and being pretty scary…

“Well, it has been my experience that most horror actors limit themselves to just that...acting. I have made it a point over my career to ask many questions and inform myself about all levels of film production. The knowledge I have picked up along the way has allowed me to participate to varying degrees in the writing, directing and producing of most of the projects in which I have been involved” -Melantha Blackthorne

“Part of me loves it, and wants to at least come close to that status. The other part of me doesn’t like that term very much, because I know a few of these ladies and there is SO much more to them than their ability to jiggle in the right places and scream at the horrible monster that’s coming their way. I don’t want to say it’s demeaning, but it isn’t as all-encompassing a description as it should be, in order to properly describe these women.” -Ryli Morgan, on the term “Scream Queen”

“Right now I think it helps to portray myself as having sex appeal. I mean, why not? I’m young and sexy, right?! But in my last film “Screaming Dead” I was actually cast as the plain, level headed girl. And that was a nice departure. I mean I can’t play the damsel in distress forever. It was fun playing the bimbo, cheerleader, and bombshell. But what comes after that for those characters? They are fun and cute when it’s a young girl playing them, but the aging version is just plain old pathetic! Think of Mrs. Roper on “Three’s Company”!!” -Rachael Robbins on being hot

“There’s this scene that I did in a movie called “Love” - basically I play this obsessive compulsive chick with numerous neuroses - my character has a fight with the other lead actor - I just seized the moment and went balls to the walls ballistic & crazy. I think everybody on set was genuinely scared, haha. Afterwards they told me the scene kicked some major ass!” -Suzi Lorraine on her favorite scene in a horror film

“I think it’s been turned into a generic word. Nowadays, ever woman in a low budget movie, horror or not, has been called a Scream Queen. The meaning has been completely diluted. My own term has become “Spicy Sister”.” -Amy Lynn best on the term Scream Queen

“One certainly doesn't become a Scream Queen without solid attributes; she could hit a high pitched scream as well as her low budget sisters could, but more importantly, well endowed or not, she was perfectly inclined to go topless. And the willingness to go topless has been the number one requirement of a working Scream Queen since the 'big' 80's.” -Debbie Rochon on Scream Queens

“I have set myself apart by perfecting a Jekyll & Hyde switch in films. I often start out normal -- an apparent victim -- and then something happens to transform me into a villain. Like, I get possessed by demons, or go insane and become a homicidal maniac, or I get bitten and turn into a blood-sucking vampire. (Examples of that are "HAUNTING FEAR", "SPIRITS", "GRANDMOTHER'S HOUSE", and "TRANSYLVANIA TWIST".) I've also played a lot of strong female characters, despite my petite size (like "HYBRID", "CORPSES ARE FOREVER") -- and I've fondly been dubbed "The thinking man's Scream Queen" because of my college degrees.” -Brinke Stevens, on what makes her different from other women in horror

“ I think my name is pretty cool...hell that's why I use it.... to hear a horror actress playing a vampire or monster or something & her name is like June summers it just doesn't seem right” -Syn Devil on her name

”…The final, bloody killing scene in “Chainsaw Sally”. Something about having all that fake blood splashed on me while holding a running chainsaw as I stand over my victim really lights my fire! Call me crazy...” -April Burril on her favorite scene in Chainsaw Sally

Women have minds and intellect and talent. And beauty. And they can be terrifying. From film festivals to magazines to movies, women are taking a much bigger role in horror than ever before, and it’s time someone was there to get the story straight. That’s what Pretty/Scary is all about….

For Press Information, Submissions, and General Info:
Pretty/Scary
www.pretty-scary.com
Press contact: heidi@pretty-scary.com

Tuesday, June 01, 2004

Sorry for the Inconvenience...

Welcome to Hell is currently under re-re-reconstruction. I'll be back online and current reeeeeal soon. Don't sweat it.

Thursday, February 19, 2004

"Hope for the World"

HOPE FOR THE WORLD

A Video Review of "The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring"

Copyright 2003 Glenn Walker

Although I am a veteran of fantasy role-playing games I have to admit to having never getting through J.R.R. Tolkien’s "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy. In high school I read the first book (on which this film is based but is very fuzzy in my memory so you won’t find any book-to-film comparisons in this review) and struggled to start "The Two Towers" and failed during my college days. Tolkien is unfortunately very dense (at least to me). I file him along with H.P. Lovecraft. They are both amazing concept men but as writers they are dreary and nearly incomprehensible (to me at least - if only to avoid the slings and arrows of smarter people).

Peter Jackson’s The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring is completely accessible which I think surprised everyone especially the casual moviegoer and those evil Hollywood critics who both shun fantasies at every turn. Perhaps there is hope for this sad sad world yet if concepts like good against evil, responsibility and friendship still resound in people’s hearts.

The story revolves around a powerful ring of great evil in a long ago fantasy land. A conglomeration of different races elects a band to take the ring to be destroyed in the place it was forged. Hilarity ensues, as they say.

It all begins with hobbit Bilbo Baggins skillfully played by Ian Holm (Alien, The Fifth Element) and his birthday party in Hobbiton. It’s a happy bright occasion that slowly devolves into darkness. The conversion is handled well and the viewer is easily led to understand the peril encompassing all of Middle-Earth. It is this subtlety that makes TLOTR so accessible to the mainstream. The show rather than tell is the key.

The cursed ring is put into the hands of Bilbo’s nephew Frodo (Elijah Wood of The Good Son and The Faculty) and along with friend Samwise (Sean Astin of Rudy) and wizard Gandalf (Sir Ian McKellen) they set off the have the ring destroyed. This is probably one of McKellen’s best roles and performances and that’s saying a lot. He is one of the world’s finest actors. In Gandalf he reflects many facets and emotions from leadership and bravery to fear and mystery. He’s not your average everyday wizard.

The rest of the cast is remarkable as well. Christopher Lee is back doing what he did so well in years past - playing believably evil villains. His Saruman is both motivated and emotionally impenetrable. The battle between him and Gandalf is stunning and powerful. Speaking of evil, Cate Blanchett brief evil turn as Galadriel tempted by the ring is spellbinding.

Young cocky boys that they are, Viggo Mortensen as Strider and Orlando Bloom as Legolas insisted on performing their own stunts that resulted in broken ribs and teeth. They’re also pretty good as actors too. The all too brief moment shared by Strider and Arwen (played with remarkable and unexpected skill by Liv Tyler) shows a chemistry and electricity I would have liked to have seen more of, if not in the TLOTR trilogy than in any other film.

Of course the real star of the film is the special effects. From the minor forced perspective shots to make full-sized actors into three and four feet tall hobbits and dwarves (John Rhys-Davies is a particularly difficult trick into the dwarf Gimli) to the fiery Balrog to the stunning matte paintings and CGI armies the special effects in Fellowship are truly among the best ever done.

The New Zealand locales, especially Hobbiton which was built a full year before shooting began so that it would look old and lived in, are amazing. This is due in part to the unparalleled skill of cinematographer Andrew Lesnie but mostly to the breathtaking landscapes of the region itself. The original music score of Howard Shore only enhances the sheer majesty of the film itself.

Unlike myself writer director Peter Jackson has read the "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy. He knows what it’s about, and he has nothing but love and respect for the work and its creator. The project for Jackson began as a pitch to make "The Hobbit." After seeing his superior accomplishments with this film I can’t wait for the next two and hope he gets to do the original one. See The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring. It’s truly one of the best films ever made.


Tuesday, February 17, 2004

"Dead End" (1937)

CULTURE CLASH

A Video Review of "Dead End"

Copyright 2003 Glenn Walker

This 1937 classic directed by William Wyler and starring Humphrey Bogart, Sylvia Sidney and the Dead End Kids is a timeless story of culture clash. The lush high-rises of the rich look down on the tenements of the poor over the scenic East River in new York causing an interesting mix of folks good and evil.

You get one of everything here. An college studied architect reduced to painting signs, a seamstress on strike and her brother in a street gang, a wanted gangster come home to see his ma and his girl, a rich kid terrorized by the street gang, a society girl in love with the secretive architect – all circling in an endless cycle, eventually sucked into the bottomless toilet of the East River.

It’s almost like film noir without the detective. It is film noir, everyone is a loser in a struggle. The losers with hopes and dreams and a chance for survival you grow to love and root for. Like I said it’s a different film noir, one with hope.

For a time this was a lost film and I’m glad it was finally found. The actors are in top form and Bogart cuts his teeth here with the gangster role that would catapult him to the heights. Don’t miss this classic.